SCOTSGAY MAGAZINE ================= ScotsGay is a monthly magazine for lesbians, gay men and bisexuals. Edited, printed and published in Scotland ScotsGay 60/- Light - Issue 33a - May 2000 ELECTRONIC EDITION ***Now available on the Web: http://www.scotsgay.co.uk/ How to Subscribe and Unsubscribe information is now at the END of the magazine. All Material Copyright (c) Pageprint Limited 2000. Permission is hereby given to distribute this material provided that this copyright notice is included and that distribution is specifically for non-profitmaking reasons. Distribution for profit must be done only with prior written consent of the magazine any deviation from this will be seen as an infringement of copyright. Hardcopies are limited to one per person for personal use only and such hard copies are subject to the same copyright restrictions as laid out above. The printed edition of ScotsGay is available by post at the following rates: 6 issue sub (UK & EC) 6ukp 6 issue sub (Overseas) 12ukp 12 issue sub (UK & EC) 12ukp 12 issue sub (Overseas) 24ukp Make Cheques and POs payable to 'Pageprint'or 'ScotsGay'and send them to: Subscriptions ScotsGay Magazine PO Box 666 Edinburgh Scotland EH7 5YW Inside this issue: Edinburgh Granny Spice Glasgow Aberdeen Nun Sense Scottish Media Monitor - War Edition Sad Corner Dundee Moray ScotsGay Voice for 1-2-1 Boxes - the ScotsGay Meet Market Venues ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Edinburgh/Dun Eideann --------------------- The Edinburgh gay scene is a happy mix of bars and one nighters. Nobody hates the gay scene in this nation's capital at all. What follows are the results of this month's poll. Top Bar 1. Planet Out 2. The Newtown Bar Top One Nighter 1. JOY! 2. ICONS Top Cafe 1. Blue Moon 2. NEXUS Do you believe that so few votes were cast for worst of the scene that they aren't worth printing? It's true. Loads of support from happy punters of Planet Out, and the (exclusively male) fans of the Newtown Bar did their local proud. Anyway, I'd better get on with it as the Trypesetter's an absolute fucking lunatic (no dahling, just pre-menstrual-Trypesetter) and this copy's late. Thanks to Ali for covering last time, when I was poorly. I don't have any idea where he is now though. Where to start... How about the workaholics Alan and Maggie at JOY? One of Edinburgh's longest-running club nights, and the superior gay one nighter will be celebrating its 7th birthday in July. Yes JOY! Is SEVEN years old! Maggie and Alan are the resident DJs on the main dance floor spinnin' hard house and trance while sooo shy Trendy Wendy and Sally Findlay pack the back room with classic tunes, camp disco and whatever takes their fancy. Alan says to "Expect a friendly, gay crowd with no pretensions." And he's right. Meanwhile MINGIN', Alan's alternative club night moves into its third year, and is now running fortnightly on Saturdays. DJ Brian Dempster kicks the night off with his bouncy hard house allowing Alan to end the night with a journey through dark, sexy, dirty trance. Cool. And while we're into one nighters how's about UP! then? Yes, another club with capital letters. I'm off to take a couple of piccies at UP as we go to press-expect a report next month. Oh and some idiot called Smithe (?!) has bet me a tenner not to mention Funky Alan from ICONS and Planet Out this month as I'm always bangin' on about him, and the marvellous one-nighter he helps run. Keep your money, sucker! Before I forget, a big hello to Ed who works in the Blue Moon Cafe, who, apparently is the straight looking one. Anyway he's had a birthday party last month, and, er, he doesn't think he's got any friends. So go say hi to Eddie when you order your Nachos or whatever. He's blond, has blue eyes and he hates me now. What is happening at CC Blooms? How busy can a gay bar be? Not much if you're going to keep legal. It took twenty-five minutes of queueing inside the club to get to the dance floor last weekend. A very popular place is CC's, but they have to sort this out. The 1st of July The Claremont will host the Scottish Heat of Mr. Bear UK, anyone interested should contact e-mail BearScots@bearlovers.demon.co.uk Now I plan to retire from writing scene stuff in a couple of months, so if you can do this better, (and face it, who couldn't?) get in touch. I'm afraid I'm turning thirty soon and I'm getting far too old for all this shit. Lots of Love, Martin mgwuk@hotmail.com ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Granny Spice ------------ The homophobes stride on. Big money, lots of lies and misinformation backed up by Cardinal Poofbasher and his henchmen who fix your cars and provide your buses. His moonface preening from the Scotsman's pages as he epistles his propagandist gauleiter. Lots of big bigot money is out there pushing the agenda that we are all predators, poised to jump on their schoolkids-trumped by Media House hacks who tremble lest Poofbasher Jack discover their own nasty little skeletons. Apart from a few brave people who drubbed one of his buses in Glasgow bright pink, Mr. Sheridan who publicly burned ballot papers and the always faithful Wendy Alexander, where were you? The saga of the back stabbing triumvirate of Lanarkshire came as no surprise to those who understand West of Scotland politics. We know their majorities come from the Roman Sheep vote, but what utter silence from those who continue to benefit from the pink pound? Boy George put up an impressive performance on Question Time and made the Homophobe Busman cringe. I'm sure he satisfied those timorous Jessies who told me "I hope George doesn't go too far, Beti. We've come so far" So far from where? They make me sick. If it wasn't for the gay pioneers and brave mag editors, these silly Queens would still be running around in their own cesspools of closetry. Have they got you all completely scared? There are gay people out there who know about the "hypocrites" within the unholy machine that's trying to crush us, denigrate our rights and set Scottish gay liberties back 20 years. Why don't you have the guts to speak up and expose them? And now the biggest local authority in the country has suspended funding to gay organisations as they genuflect before the altar of expediency and a "Christian" nurse -a Madame Strain from Govanhill. She's funded by yet more Christian homophobes (from Newcastle, not even in this jurisdiction) and seems to spend her time monitoring gay web sites. Is she trawling them to "raise" her minister husband's counselling skills or does she, like the rest of us, get her kicks from looking at men? Can we expect any action from the Sandies and Julians of Morningside and Kelvinside who sit back on their arses all the time and let gay pioneers take the flack, the beatings and the hassle? You all know the types, who sip their half pints, talk incessantly about their mortgages and blubber on about "Oh I do think that Beti Hutton goes too far", or "Peter Tatchell is too much with his outings-we're doing alright almost accepted. And we do have one or two fag hags who love us". These prissy queens make me want to vomit. If it wasn't for the Ian Dunns of yesteryear, they'd still be cringing in their closeted best, forced into loveless marriages-instead of getting legless in CC's or fucked silly in the saunas. For goodness sake get off your knees and organise against this bastion of bigotry and ignorance! Enuff said... Brenda has returned from the Ho where the sailors can now breathe easier. She tells me Glasgow seems somewhat dull after the South West with its emerging surfers and sailors. Well old girl, you'll just have to get down to Portobello sands and see what's doing-during the recent warm spell the cock was certainly being displayed! Big Shona has intimated that she'll be in Newcastle within the week, so Gateshead queens be aware that the fashion conscious Guru of New Gorbals will be watching what you are wearing on the Newcastle scene this weekend! Dropped into one or two bars in both cities the other week, incognito with my new Peterhead look haircut and weight-loss and was hardly noticed as I paraded my alter-ego (I love it 'cos I can pick up the snippets better that way). I was disappointed that there seemed to be more straights than gays in certain establishments but, as usual, Austins won the prize for the nicest staff and friendly atmosphere. Glasgow's saunas could offer more in the way of concessions for the less-well off since, unlike Edinburgh's No 18 (certainly the best in Scotland), Glasgow establishments seem keener to turn the quick buck than share the profits of the pink pound with those less advantage. Maybe they think there are no unemployed gay people-take note please! Lady Grace Kelly of Leadhills has received the first hill walking visitors and Thomas "The Tank" (and we all know why he's called that!) has done his best to entertain them out on them thar hills. Thomas, it is said, takes his tank around Strathclyde park these days so if you can avoid the pretty polis on bikes, trying getting your laughing gear round Hamilton's answer to Jeff Stryker! Well that's what Grace tells me since she's had her teeth out she just about manages it! I must admit he does cut a dashing figure in his fatigues. I'm off to Paris in the morning so I'll let you know about French toast next issue. Keep the Homofaith. Speak up against the Christian homophobes at work-tell them any man who picked up fishermen on a beach and ran around with hookers couldn't have been all that bad.That usually freaks their ass! Constantly remind them of the role of the Catholic Church in the Holocaust! Lastly, save your pennies for Gay Pride in Rome when we can extract our revenge on the burning handbag queens. Learn how to stand up against the Homophobes and exploit their weaknesses. Be brave. beti@drink.demon.co.uk ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Glasgow/Glaschu --------------- Hiya Scumbagz! I've been asked by Scott from Planet Peach to tell you all that the Tuesday and Monday nights are not going to be stopping. Some malicious little queens have been spreading rumours again - nothing new there! Peachies has had strippers recently, and boyband Reign also did a PA which went down quite well with the twinkies. They were also giving away free drink that night - you should have seen the rush to the bar when that was announced. Other events planned are a PA by Titney Spears (Britney tribute), a Rainbow Fund benefit night, and don't forget ShagTag on Tuesday 30th of May. There will also be running a competition on Monday nights where you have the chance to win a weekend for two in London - look out for the posters!. My comments about Sadies last month certainly provoked a reaction with a lot of you. I've had loads of you telling me how bad things are getting, and how the place now seems to be letting in any old trash to fill the place up. A few of you have also been complaining about the lack of keg beer in the place. Obviously, as someone who spent 14 years in the licensed trade, I have my own theories as to why a bar frequently runs out of keg beer, and many of you who know the trade have come to the same conclusions. All the signs are there! Over in Centurion Health Club, Gordon and Alex have been splashing out and the club now has Internet facilities. Unlike most venues, use of the equipment is totally free of charge, and they are also in the process of installing webcams beside the terminals. Great fun webcams, I've got one in the Goldilocks mansion, and I've got 12 perverts looking at me as I write this. The correct spare part for the Jacuzzi finally arrived, and you can hardly get in it these days while everyone makes up for lost time!! The new showers have made a huge difference too, as has the new furniture - the "rest" room now has comfy sofas. Following legal action, Glasgow City Council has cut off funding to various arts, health and LGBT groups throughout the city. The groups concerned have now formed the West of Scotland Alliance, and Stonewall has offered financial assistance to allow them to mount a legal case in defence of their funding. The original case against the City Council was brought by The Christian Institute, who appear to find it acceptable to withdraw funding for groups involved in HIV education and support, including one set up by mothers to look after their HIV+ children. The May Day March and Rally was held on Sunday the 7th, and the Scrap the Section groups had a bus on the march and a stall on Glasgow Green. The weather was brilliant, some of the group handed out leaflets on the way, whilst others took it in turns on the Public Address system to let everybody know how we all feel about Brian Souter and his odious campaign. After reaching the Green, most of us headed for the tent to listen to speeches from Unions, councillors and our MSPs. The majority of the people I spoke to were in favour of scrapping S2A, but even those who weren't expressed concern that someone like Mr Souter is able to spend a million pounds on his poster campaign, then spend more on his so-called referendum in the hope that the public have been fooled into believing the lies and misinformation. Some of us decided to mount an attack on the Daily Record's roadshow, and headed off with sheets of stickers. Security was non-existent, and we managed to put loads of stickers on the vehicle before the Daily Record called for the police on air. Pathetic!! Some of the group remained on the stall, and the rest of us returned to Buchanan Street, where we spent a few more hours handing out leaflets and stickers to passers by. The most interesting people we encountered were the children that this law is supposed to be protecting. The ones I spoke to certainly didn't seem to think they needed protecting, and felt that they should be entitled to information regarding all aspects of sexuality and sex education. By the time you read this, the 'referendum' will be over, and hopefully the Scottish Executive will continue to take the stance that although Souter is free to squander money on this expensive ego trip, decisions regarding the future of the Scottish public should remain in the hands of those that we actually elect to legislate for us. It's just a pity that Mr Souter persists in wasting money on this lost cause which could be better spent in a country where a quarter of children are growing up in poverty, hospital waiting lists grow ever longer, and crime continues to rise. The next event to look out for is the March for Equality and Diversity (Scrap Section 28) in Edinburgh on June 24th. There are plans to organise buses, so look out for flyers, posters etc. This is your chance to actually do something constructive. If you can't be bothered to write letters to the press and your MSPs etc, at least prise yourself off that barstool and come through for the march next month. Time for a look at the Pub and Club Ratings which always get me into so much trouble (You think I give a fuck?). BEST PUB was Austins (36%), The Waterloo second with 31% and The Poo last again (0%). BEST CLUB NIGHT was Trade (46%) with Planet Peach second at 26%. As Slave seems to be considered as a Gay club these days, I've included it in the listings for BEST CLUB and this month they came second (19%), with Bennets winning at 68% . As usual, The Waterloo won BEST SERVICE at 36% with Austins in second place (31%) and The Poo and Sadies coming joint last at 2%. Winner of BIGGEST DUMP this month was The Poo (31%), second was Dels (29%) and Sadies came third (19%) Been a few changes down at Slave on Tuesday nights. They've now decided to admit girlies as some of the pansies were complaining that their straight girlfriends couldn't get in. Look out for strippers on the first Tuesday of the month as well as a PA, and new drinks promos. Better also apologise to Mimi Martini who was giving me grief for spelling her name wrongly last month. Hell hath no fury like a tranny having a drama! SNIPPETS Lola has been bending my ear again regarding a comment I printed made by Big Greg about her knickers, and wants me to make it quite clear that she doesn't wear any. - The Scrap the Section groups are still looking for stewards for the march in Edinburgh on the 24th of June. If you would like to help, please call 0141-204 0746 and leave your details. - Big slap across the wrists this month to John from the GGLC Cafe for interrupting me in another establishment in mid-shag (and I mean right in the middle of it). And then you have the gall to call me a slapper!! - You really pick your moments don't you! - It's official - combats are finally dead according to the Scotsman newspaper! At fucking last! "Clothes maketh not the man, and in the case of combat trousers, they maketh the man look so two years ago" says the Scotsman, and this is directed at all those naff breeders who still think they are the height of trendiness, never mind the pansies who should have binned them years ago. No doubt DAVE is already penning another entry for the Guestbook on the Goldilocks webshite. - Most bizarre memory of last month happened in the Town House Sauna again. We turned up, not realising that the bears were having their monthly meeting and found the place packed. 130 people in while we were there, and all of us slim creatures having to fight to get in the Jacuzzi along with all these bears. I'm not into fat furry guys so it was all great fun ensuring that the Goldilocks weekly body count was kept up to the usual number. - Big Greg will be starting a Monday club night in Slave in a few weeks time. Not sure what the outcome will be, with Planet Peach, Media and Slave fighting for the little trade there is on Mondays. Enjoy it while it lasts, cos it won't! - Eddy has the following films lined up for you at the GGLC Cafe Film Night - Blade on 29th May, Seven on 5th June and The Matrix on 12th June with more to come. The films start at 9pm, and it was decided to move from the Tuesday night to avoid overlapping with Greg's Bingo night and the Youth Group. - Pat on the back to the staff at Dels. Apparently the keg beer was really shite one night recently, and the staff were actually courteous enough to advise the customers not to drink it!! STOP PRESS! Details just in of the Scrap the Section benefit gig at 13th Note in Clyde Street. It's on Fri 2nd June from 8pm - 3am and admission is 2 pounds. Bands confirmed so far are Macrocosmica, Bangtwister, The Social Lepers and Soulfinger. Love, Goldilocks Website:- http://www.gay-glasgow.co.uk E-mail:- goldilocks@gay-glasgow.co.uk ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aberdeen/Obar Dheadhain ----------------------- Well, that time of the month has arrived once more, and as usual I'm at the coo's tail when it comes to getting it handed in! To make matters worse, I have an extremely sore head brought about by copious amounts of Mudd Club beer, and a very sore left wrist which I gained after a game of football with a plastic bottle! (That's the first time I've ever heard that euphemism-Ed.) Ah, the evils of alcohol! A change is as good as a rest, so they say, and lately I've been checking out some other places around Aberdeen which may or may not be of interest to the lesbigay community. Oh Henry's seems to be pulling in an interesting crowd of late. I've noticed quite a few familiar faces on the few occasions that I've been in. Friends have been known to pull occasionally too. It's free to get in from Sunday through to Wednesday, pints are only UKP 1.20 and there are various other drinks promotions. Another place that could have potential is Po Na Na, downstairs at the Athenaeum. It's a nicely decorated little club with lots of nooks and crannies. The booze is cheap, and if you get in before 11pm there's no door tax. The music was pretty good, and cheeze-free too, which is always a bonus! As usual, there doesn't seem to be anything exciting happening in our regular queer haunts. The City Bar now has a pool table, which should go down well with the women. I don't know what it is about dykes and pool tables. Hopefully it will do something to boost the number of people going to the CB, which still seems to be fairly quiet these days, even at the weekends. It could just be a case of people finding out that I intend to go out for a pint, and avoiding the place as a result! That's about all for this month. No doubt his Heiness will see fit to stick in a photograph of a phone box or something else totally unconnected with the Aberdeen scene! As usual, any news, gossip, etc. should be sent to me c/o ScotsGay. Until next month, adios! Gus gus@drink.demon.co.uk --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Nun Sense --------- "Sister Athletica! Sister Athletica de la Bain! Where are you?" called the Amanuensis. "It's time to get into the archives and write up how much money we earned for HIV/AIDS and gay-related charities over the last year. What are you doing in there anyway?" A grunt was heard from the reredorter. "I'm tidying up the shrine to San Agua Deportivo de los Orinales Sagrados. Can you be a darling and tell the dear readers all about what we've been up to during the last month?" "But it's been a quiet month, mostly recovering from last month's hard work. I could tell them about how you're off to sunny Manchester for another important conference." "What's the matter, sweetie?" interrupted Sister Bobby. "It's the column for ScotsGay. The Editor has actually let us have a whole three-quarters of a page to ourselves, rather than us having to bribe the Trypesetter, and we've been resting for most of the last month. And Sister Athletica has been so busy in the reredorter that she hasn't had time to summarise our achievements!" "Hmm... How about telling them about the stall? You know, our special new service for the Gathered Faithful. Here's a bit I wrote about it: "The second to nun, habit forming, all new Safety First Stall. Crammed full of the latest information and overflowing with loads of free goodies such as condoms and lube. Why not invite us along to your party, be it stag, hen, wedding, divorce, first night, private do, bar mitzvah..." "...handfasting", said the Pagan Novice Brother Bimbo del Doppio Senso, determined to get a word in edgeways. "Whatever you're doing, let us be there! We are also available for lectures (public or private), blessings and get togethers. You invite, we turn up!" "We're a bit like sexually transmitted diseases in that respect", piped up Sister Ovina Fornicata. Sister Bobby continued: "And don't forget about the weekend ScotsGay hits the streets. We'll be in Edinburgh then, trawling the scene with those sweeties from the Equality Network." "...Praise be to Saint Tim Terrae Obscurae Potentiae Incredibilis!", called out Novice Cornelia from the back. "Indeed, and the Equality Network doesn't have rich millionaires funding it, and they've spent everything on stamps, so we're going to persuade the gathered faithful to give a little bit each to help oppose the forces of guilt, hatred and misinformation. We'll be out on Saturday night, and Sunday afternoon and night, all over Edinburgh. So there'll be no hiding from us!" "And if I put their ad on our page, that'll fill the space nicely." BUG OF THE MONTH: GENITAL WARTS Symptoms: small cauliflower-like bumps in or around your bum, vagina or on your cock. Appear: between one week to four months after contact. Exposure: through contact with another wart. If untreated: spreading of virus deeper inside, sometimes requiring surgery. Prevention: easily prevented by sending away for one of our safety packs. See our advertisement on page 16 for details/ Cure: Removal by burning, freezing, painting with Podophyllum (this last one is not available to pregnant women). Anyone with whom you've recently had sex should also get themselves checked by their G.P. or at a clinic. 'Bug of the Month' is ripped off from Play Fair, written by Sister Dana van Iquity and published by the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, Inc. in San Francisco. EQUALITY NETWORK APPEAL FOR FUNDS For the past three years the Equality Network, Scotland's national campaign network for LGBT equality, has been effectively run on a zero budget. A reliable, regular income would let us do more and better lobbying and campaigning, especially in view of the resurgence of homophobic views and fundamentalist influence in Scotland which we have seen during the recent Section 28 debate. Please consider making a regular donation to the work of the Equality Network. For more information and a standing order form, write to us at. 58a Broughton Street, Edinburgh EH1 3SA E-mail: equality@diversity.org.uk WWW: http://www.diversity.org.uk/equality/ ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Scottish Media Monitor ---------------------- Garry Otton Charting the Rise of Fascism in Scotland! No one can mistake the similarities of what happened in Germany during the thirties with what we are witnessing today in Scotland. From the same paper that supported Moseley's blackshirts is a strong message maligning gays as a "mob," militant extremists who are out of control and 'storming' meetings. "Gay law mob stage protest outside Souter's church," The Scottish Mail squealed. "Gay activists and far left campaigners yesterday staged a protest outside the church where Stagecoach millionaire Brian Souter worships. The mob waved placards and chanted homosexual propaganda as churchgoers arrived... Banner-waving members of the Scottish Socialist Party marched on the church with gay rights leaders... The 50-strong mob thrust leaflets into the hands of worshippers." This is not just complete and utter drivel. It is dangerous fascist drivel. For starters... What "gay rights leaders" where in attendance? None! The peaceful protest was organised by around a dozen members of the Perth and Dundee branches of the Scottish Socialist Party. Brian's brother Rev David Souter was given space in the Daily Record to opine: "We ask Scrap the Section to restrict their future demonstrations to activities involving adults to avoid situations where children could be intimidated." This from the very people who dress their children up in Keep the Clause slogans and wheel them along in prams to demonstrations! She looked a sour-looking trout, fingers bedecked in expensive rocks, pictured in the Daily Record pushing "120,000 reasons" why children should not be "taught about homosexual lifestyle issues." It was 57-year-old Ann Gloag, 'Sophie' Souter's sister, "making her first public appearance since the funeral of her 28-year-old son Jonathan who committed suicide in September last year." She headed a "pram protest" of 100 Christian militants with their "children at the front" swaddled in Keep the Clause propaganda, marching up to the Mound. 'Jackie' Irvine stopped The Herald getting too close to Mrs Gloag and carefully orchestrated the whole march. With equality on his mind, Ayub Khan's Multi-Faith Coalition reminded the Record: "Feelings against this Bill is so strong that it has united Sikhs and Hindhus." Oh, have queers the power to do all that? Gerald Warner was practicing his drill, goose-stepping up and down the corridors of the Christian militia's friend, the Scottish Mail. "Is there no end to the march of the politically correct?" he begged. A teacher struck off for spanking his daughter - not by the Scottish Executive, but the law courts - sparked him off. In the dentist's waiting room, her dad thrashed the eight-year-old girl, terrified of her fate at the hands of the dentist, six times across her bare backside. "...Whereupon the juggernaut of politically correct intervention implacably rolled over him and his family." 'Geraldine's' right arm was up again. "The case has the fingerprints of political correctness all over it. The unfortunate teacher is a pawn in a much larger battle... It is spreading across the land like a virus. Political correctness is the creed of a tiny, bigoted but determined minority... The belief that children should be protected by Section 28 from homosexual propaganda is branded as intolerance; those who reasonably argue for its retention are demonised as homophobes." Or in your case, sweetheart: unfairly branded a repressed queer! In Scotland on Sunday 'Geraldine' went on a bender over "every malign instinct to make society more squalid by marginalizing marriage, normal family life and heterosexuality..." He 'celebrated' the Scottish Executive's first year by exercising his perverse interest in homosexuality. "People who want to safeguard children from sodomite propaganda are demonised as 'bigots'; an attempt to give the overwhelming majority a voice by referendum - the devise to which the parliament owes its own existence - is denounced as 'subverting democracy'. The very statute which will empower homosexuals to proselytise children is, by an extravagant inversion of truth, entitled the Ethical Standards in Public Life Bill." 'Geraldine' believed the parliament would celebrate by awarding, amongst others, medals for the "Limp-Wristed Activists' Open Season on Pubescent Schoolboys and similar battle honours." The Christian militia's tabloid, the Scottish Mail's opined in its editorial: "Predictably, the politicians, at least those who fear that the result is likely to go against their wishes, are queuing up to dismiss the referendum." One sentence and two lies. Firstly, it is not a referendum but a mail-shot. (At best an opinion poll). Secondly, after a prolonged campaign over many years to distort, malign and misrepresent gay sexuality, topped by a multi-million pound 'Vote for Jesus' campaign, this was bound to bring the moral conservatives out of the woodwork. "The politicians will claim victory, of course, if people do not vote. That is why it is essential that voters should take this chance to make their voices heard." And failing that, 'Sophie' will stick his hand in his pocket and pay for another 'poll' that says 'almost half' of those who didn't vote still want to Keep the Clause. The Scottish Mail resorted to some now familiar lies over sex education guidance. "If past experience is any guide, (parents') comments will be noted, while the powers that be order thousands more copies of Jenny Lives With Eric and Martin." Only one copy of Susan Bosche's harmless, but essential book aimed at helping kids with gay mums or dads was found in a teaching resources library in London. Remember the vile SmutWatch and PervertWatch campaigns that preceded the Record's venomous Keep the Clause campaign? Now the Record was in celebratory mood, declaring, "Scotland's war against porn and pėdophiles is set to be boosted by a UKP 25million Internet surveillance centre being built by M15." They quoted Tory rent-a-gob Phil Gallie to spit: "This will root out use of the Internet by pėdophiles and for pornography." It ought to have been the Daily Record's turn after the Scottish Mail to grovel to Sir Tom Farmer and apologise for claiming he called gays "cowards." But they didn't! "Sir Tom has asked us to make it clear that he was quoted incorrectly and that he never used these words, nor did he criticise any homosexual or political groups." The Daily Record had just exposed its own pernicious, homophobic campaign for what it really was. It took them a couple of paragraphs to apologise to Sir Tom and another two to reiterate the point that Farmer really supported their vile campaign. They made Sir Tom Farmer look a poor fool. It is to lesbians, gays, bisexuals and people of transgender that the Daily Record needs to apologise for an evil, malicious and spiteful militant campaign endorsed by its editor, Martin Clarke and by Scottish editor Ramsay Smith of the Scottish Mail. Fighting for credit for this vile campaign the Scottish Sun reckoned the "people's ballot" had "put the wind up our masters," adding, "had it not been for those like Brian Souter and The Scottish Sun who hammered on Holyrood's dogmatic door, there would have been no let-up." Another homophobic entrepreneur was slowly creeping up the ladder. After only a couple of years, former Sun editor Kelvin MacKenzie announced he would float his Wireless Group on the stock market. The parent company has TalkSport radio (UK), Scot FM, (Scotland), QFM, (Paisley); Wave 102 (Dundee) and many other regional or local stations. Concerns were also being expressed over the appointment of former Sunday Telegraph writer, anti-European and free-market thinker Bill Jamieson to The Scotsman who wants to steer the paper to the right. Do words like this belong in Scotland 2000? Ian Smith of the Scottish Mail i.smith@dailymail.co.uk wrote: "Keep the Clause campaigners raised fears yesterday that the powerful gay lobby was attempting to undermine the vote by questioning its legitimacy. Highly-active gay and lesbian groups have already had a major effect on the repeal process by running a concerted e-mail campaign distorting the Scottish Executive original consultation process on Section 28 in favour of scrapping the clause. (So had militant Christians)! And powerful? I watched as around forty pound was counted from a collection-box to pay for some publicity to challenge 'Sophie's' poster campaign on billboards, mobile advertisers and in bus shelters backed by Media House. I have seen a sting of millionaire militants support Keep the Clause and read the words of multi-millionaire showbiz impresario, Cameron Macintosh in the Scottish Daily Mail: "...I certainly resent the suggestion that I am any kind of gay rights campaigner. I am the exact opposite. I just want to be as integrated as any human being." Mallaig councillor Charlie King talked to The Scotsman about Mackintosh and his partner photographer Michael Le Poer Trench: "They don't walk about hand in hand or anything". Mackintosh had bought Mallaig a health centre. The so-called 'gay activists' will have to foot the bill for his human rights. Old Mother (Joan) Burnie was getting flashbacks of her convent days in the Daily Record. "...We viewing voyeurs swallow whole the endless diet of junk which would once have had us reaching for either a cold shower or the remote control". Old Mother Burnie was getting a lot more out of her TV then I ever did: "Sex has become a sort of DIY - except TV does it for us, something we watch other people do, forgetting it should never be a spectator sport. Sex is pleasurable but, above everything, intensely private... Even the trailers are bluer than a blue movie. They used to put porn high on the top shelves as something shameful and surreptitious. But now your friendly local pimps - the BBC, ITV and the rest - pump the filth right into our home, day after dreary day, until we've all become so accustomed to it we almost don't seem to notice any more. So, we sit there with our glazed-over jaded eyes as the nightly procession of sex - Sex And Shopping in 5 and Sex In The City on 4, straight sex, gay sex, under-age sex, geriatric sex, group sex, oral sex - parade through our living rooms". The Edinburgh matron nearly choked on her Clooty Dumpling when she found out how Monica Lewinsky got Bill Clinton's gism all over her dress on the ITV drama, Metropolis. "...One of the characters showed us exactly how it's done. In full colour". Oh... Amateurs! I wouldn't have made half the mess she did! For many, the murder of a gay man now seems inevitable in the present homophobic climate. The Scottish Sun revealed Alexander Noble, 50, had just died in hospital four weeks after he visited St Vincent Street 'cottage' in Glasgow and was last seen drinking in a nearby bar with a thin, scruffy man who called himself Stephen. He was aged between 19-22 and around 5ft 6in with dark hair. Alex had spent the day at Ayr races on 15 April, the day after the Daily Record had been banging its homophobic drum over grants being awarded to gay groups. The couple then proceeded to drink at the Crow Tavern near Alex's home in Coltpark Avenue, Bishopbriggs and left shortly before midnight. Alex Noble lived alone and was found next day slumped in his home with serious head wounds. A gold Accurist watch, a chain with boxing glove-shaped pendant and an ID bracelet were missing. There is no evidence this man was involved with Alex's murder but police want the man to come forward, so too the three or four occupants of a red or maroon Ford Fiesta parked outside Alex's house at around 10pm on 15 April. Although two pages were devoted to the gangland killing of 51-year-old Frank McPhie, the Daily Record managed to avoid any mention of this murder. If there is just one murder of a gay man over this vile campaign, Trinity Mirror must sack editor Martin Clarke and dispense with the services of Irvine. You need cheering up, and whilst trawling through the media I have found just the thing! Homosexual propaganda and flagrant proselytising of a type not seen since I Love Lucy. It's Will & Grace on the Living Channel, 8pm every weekday evening. And finally a wee joke... Out of 100 Santa Clauses, which one is the bufty? Claus 28? garryotton@bigfoot.com During this emergency, the SCOTTISH MEDIA MONITOR website will be updated daily. http://www.bigfoot.com/~scotmedia (c) Garry Otton 2000 CUT IT OUT! * Wee Wendy said: "Consultation is not about listening to whoever shouts the loudest or whoever employs the most sophisticated PR machines, nor is it about pulling out the largest cheque book." And on 'Sophie's' homophobic campaign: "What has been paraded has been simplistic and misleading. A campaign expensive to mount but perhaps with a cheapness all of its own... The tone and tactics of the Keep the Clause campaign has itself revealed why repeal does matter. For we seek a Scotland that looks to the future and does not allow itself to be dragged back to an indifferent and intolerant past which had too little room for inclusion and human solidarity." * Jim Sill(y)ars wanted Scottish Sun readers to look at the "arrogance" of "trendy-lefty... 'Witch'... Wendy." The Arse reckons: "We who have the temerity to disagree with Miss Alexander on Section 28, we who don't want the promotion of homosexuality in schools, are painted as thick know-nothings, bigots who live in intellectual squalor, unfit to deal with modern times." Yup! That's right... And it's Ms Alexander to you, pal! * Tom 'Brigadier' Brown reflected in the Daily Record on wee Wendy, "back in her most infuriating finger-wagging lecture style." And wondered if 'Sophie' Souter was getting his moneys worth out of the SNP. "Stagecoach tycoon Brian Souter has put his personal fortune behind the 'Keep the Clause' campaign - as well as donating cash to the Nationalists. Will he be satisfied with their spokeswoman Nicola Sturgeon's oh-so-carefully worded formula...?" * The pigs at the Scottish Mail think wee Wendy pushed repeal of Section 28 through with "pig-headed determination." * Whoring her family-values agenda to Scotland on Sunday, Katie Grant spat: "I notice that the unattached Ms Alexander has taken to bagging the seat next to the First Minister. I say to Donald, don't even think of it unless you want your life to be dominated henceforth by the wagging finger. I could make a joke about Warfarin here but good taste prevents me." * Geraldine Warner on women MSPs: "Roly-polys with attitude." * One of Jack Irvine's wee tantrums in the Daily Record: "If the Parliament and its committee poodles do not listen to the views of Scotland's parents then Keep the Clause will not only continue its campaign but dramatically accelerate its activities." And we'll have to take away your rattle! * Keep the Clause on the three who braved arrest and allegedly painted a Stagecoach bus pink: "Once again members of the public have been put at risk by the outrageous actions of mindless people hell bent on trying to pervert the democratic rights of the Scottish electorate in the Section 28 referendum". Errr... "Once again"? "Trying to pervert the democratic rights of the Scottish electorate"? One pink bus versus the biggest privately funded campaign in Scottish history! Work it out! * Donald Dewar (with the help of Julie Andrews) on the Parliament's first year: "Super-Parliamentary-Year, The-Media-Are-Ferocious." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Sad Corner ---------- Details of a pre-2000 type two motion selector in an A-unit of a Unit Automatic Exchange No 12. This particular example, constructed in 1948, provided automatic telephone service to the village of Tomdoun for nearly fifty years until it was replaced by a second hand electronic UXD5 which had previously served Luss. Whilst this type of electromechanical equipment could theoretically have been used by Centurion Spa for their new 'Call-'n'-Cruz' service, in practice, it would have been unsuitable due to its low traffic carrying capacity - the exchange, as equipped, could only handle six concurrent calls although it could provide service for a maximum of 45 subscribers (with up to 6 junctions to the parent exchange). The UAX12's grey A, B & C racks are now part of the extensive collection of obsolete communications equipment built up over the last 25 years by a gay man in Edinburgh. As well as a representative collection of telephone instruments, he owns one position of a PMBX1A (with ancillary equipment), a Switchboard CB873 (a 5+25 PMBX) and a number of smaller manual boards. He is currently looking for a PMBX4 - if you know where any may be found, please contact him by E-mail: TKO@drink.demon.co.uk. Next month...? -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dundee/DunDeagh --------------- It's all fun foam and frolics at Liberty! Brian in his ongoing quest to provide that sometime 'a little bit extra' to the patrons of Liberty took various suggestions on board and the results manifested themselves recently. An Ibiza Foam Party night was held and apart from the bloody machine breaking down it was a fab night. Pictures to follow soon! Yeah. Rumour was that Brian made the foam machine himself after watching too much of 'Blue Peter'. Errh..well blue something anyway! And when the machine rapped its hand in half way through the night Brian was strangely absent? However general consensus is that this type of event once in a while is a worthwhile change from the norm and there is more to follow! So it's a case of watch this space. Occasionally, there appears from the dark spectre of the dance floor something different. And believe me they don't come much more different than the dynamic duo known affectionately as Dundee's own 'Daphne and Celeste' a.k.a Wayne and Scott! They can be seen on a regular basis doing the dance floor a service by providing the less skillful dancers among us (Ok I admit it: me, but Alan Brand as well!) with a bit of a master class in modern dance. So it's a Big Hello to 'Big Red Fae the land o' Bridies' and Smiley. Some new additions to the bar team occurred and the unthought of or unheard of precedent has taken place! Yes they've now got a lovely lady behind the bar! Sarah H has joined the bar team. The bar staff was also expanded to include three lovely laddies as well...oh Matron! Marc, Simon and David, so it's a big hello to them as well. The dance floor at Liberty is never a lonely place (unlike Riverside) and BP the resident maestro on the decks has given it to me! Oh sorry, the Top 5 most requested dance tracks I mean. I feel a competition coming on! I'll give you the top four and anyone guessing the No 1 will get a mystery star prize! Here they are 5- Day and Knight (Sleaze Sisters Mix) Billie Piper 4- Sex Bomb Mousse T & Tom Jones 3- New Emotion 2000 TTF 2- It Feels so Good Sonique and Number One! Well that's where you all come in, it's audience participation time! Just e-mail me with your Guess or hand it in on a bit of paper thingy to BP next time you're in Liberty's. Don't worry if he looks very nervous, it's only because we've no idea what the prize is yet to be, but it'll be cheap! However elsewhere 'the game's afoot!' If you fear for your life or perhaps seek the excitement and danger of a close brush with death then Charlies Bar will interest you? Yes, they've resurrected the popular pastime of 'Killer Pool'. Simply a 'winner stays on' pool tournament with the victor claiming a bottle of vodka. I think the killer bit kicks in when you have to drink it, but I could be wrong. The once in a while Karaoke fest at Charlies is worth a 'look see' also. This month's 'hmmm look at him'! award goes to Victor for the stunning 'kilt and chains' number he wore recently. He looked fab, even made his pal Tomas look butch! He is, however, a welcome break from the usual shirt and half-mast trousers brigade, and for that receives the accolade he so richly deserves. Oh, almost forgot it: a big 'bon voyage' to James and Paul fae Arbroath, they're off to the big smoke of London soon. So we'll all miss them. But just think of the cheap holiday opportunities knowing them can now provide! Well that's it for the noo, anything you'd like to say, have others know etc then just drop me a line at the old Email address etc. Last line goes to Barry Mann who is representing Dundee at the grand final of Mr Gay UK at Birmingham this month. He is understandably nervous but proud to carry the flag for good old Dundee. The best of luck to him, and if you're lucky enough to be going remember to cheer! Etc. Perry XX perryj@drink.demon.co.uk ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Moray/Moireibh -------------- I thought it would make a nice change this month if I didn't start off by harping on about how tricky it is to write a large article for this page. So, even though it is, I won't. I'll just pad it out in the usual fashion and hopefully no-one will notice! As I mentioned last time I was due to report on the Annual General Meeting for the Moray Firth Social Group but as it was 'postponed' (yet again) I am none the wiser. What is going on with that? Surely the committee can get its act together for one week and arrange to meet together in the same room, on the same day and-to top it off-at the same time? When I put this to one of the committee members I was told that it's because most of them are resigning that they're not turning up! That's all very well but where does that leave all the Wednesday-night visitors who have travelled in especially for it, only to be greeted by a notice stuck on the door announcing the decision to postpone the meeting once again? And before I'm started on, I'm not bitching-there are many pissed-off people out there! However at the last Wednesday night gathering a few visitors were talking about organising an outing, complete with picnic, to take place during the warmer months (I think we've had our summer, guys!) so that should be entertaining. More details to follow. Well it looks like he's actually going ahead and doing it this time! Andrew the Plumm is definitely upping sticks, finishing his job here and heading off into the sunset (well, to Edinburgh anyway) to make a fresh start. With him goes another Morayite, Willie B, who also gets an exit visa to walk through the giant gates and on to pastures new. (What am I talking about?) As I write this they will probably be away in the next week or so, so good luck, guys! All my Christmases came at once (so to speak) when a group of us headed down the road to see again the phenomenon that is Steps, live at the SECC. Oh, Lee! Is he not the most gorgeous creation? (sigh) No?! Well I didn't make him... for you! They were fabulously camp as usual and just what the doctor ordered! Roll on November when they'll be back. It seems that Joannas is the latest pick-up joint! I know of a few successful, er, friendships that have blossomed from there over the past few weeks... and I'm not talking about the staff... or people allegedly getting turfed out of the toilets for lewd acts. No, it's the regular punters that are causing the stir! Straight indeed - yeah, right. I approve. More of this capering, I say, and it's such a classier place than the Winding Walks... or WH Smiths for that matter! Now, onto that Brian Souter again for what is turning into a monthly rant from me in this column. And why not? Not only does he have his damn billboards all over the country but he gets all over the TV too. Did you see him on Question Time? Wasn't it was fabulous to see him get slated by so many people and it's completely true what that man said in the audience-he can hide in any kind of sheep's clothing but he's still a bigot. Then he gets a whole North Tonight special dedicated to his cause. Thankfully Bobby Russell was also on the programme doing what he does best-speaking out for the gay community and making it clear that there are actually some very powerful organisations out there who are completely in favour of the Clause going! Let's hope this home-made opinion poll is a complete failure. The man's a twat. Well that's about it for this month, nothing else to add, so I'll leave you to it. Have fun and make the most of every minute. Dr. Kenniff drkenniff@drink.demon.co.uk ----------------------------------------------------------------------- SCOTSGAY VOICE FOR PERSONALS ============================ (We regret that this service is only available within the UK) To reply to ScotsGay Voice Ads, phone 09068 556613 (calls charged at 60p per minute) and use the number at the end of the ad. You can leave your own ad FREE on FREEphone 0800 138 4121. Edinburgh Couples Michael, 28 years old, 6' tall, shaven head, blue eyes. Looking for M/M or M/F couples in the Edinburgh area for good evenings in. Can travel but not accommodate. Phone 09068 556613 - Number 3274. Young And Sporty 22 year old Glasgow sports-lover. Seeking someone of a similar age for fun and possible relationship. Phone 09068 556613 - Number 3276. 18 + 19 = 69 ? 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Phone 09068 556613 - Number 9628. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- BOXES - THE SCOTSGAY MEET MARKET ================================ To reply to a Contact Ad: By e-mail: We can now accept replies by e-mail for Box Numbers. They should be sent to boxreplies@drink.demon.co.uk and will be printed out and posted on by snail mail to the box number holders. There will be no charge for this service. As box number holders are unlikely to have access to e-mail, please include your name and address so that they can get back to you! And remember to include the box number that you're replying to clearly on each reply. By snail mail: Just pop your reply in an envelope with the box number written in the TOP RIGHT corner and place the envelope with your reply inside another envelope with two loose first class stamps. If you are writing from outside the UK, an International Reply Coupon (IRC) should be enclosed for each reply instead of postage stamps. International Reply Coupons are available from most Post Offices throughout the world. We are unable to send on replies without postage stamps or IRCs. Send all replies to: ScotsGay Magazine, PO Box 666, Edinburgh. EH7 5YW. To place a Contact Ad: Write to the above address enclosing your advertisement copy. Ads are FREE of charge to the advertiser. Or you can send them by e-mail to scotsgay@drink.demon.co.uk WOMEN Queer Volleyball Enthusiasts Any queer female volleyball enthusiasts out there for establishing Scottish Volleyball Team? You have played before and enjoy gathering occasionally for tournaments? WWW: http://members.tripod.co.uk/femvolley/index.html or write Box SG33101. Young Frisky Woman I'm just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off me, I'd be like heaven to touch... Honestly, if you're not too awful to look at, female, over 21, not too awful to have and hold, reply. Box SG33113. Falkirk - Central Scotland 26 year old looking for friends. I've just got out of a relationship and have moved to a new town. I am finding it very difficult to meet new friends. I'm looking for people to correspond with or hang out with. I'm getting sick of my own company - save me from the boredom! Box SG33117. Calling All Golfers Interested in joining a friendly social group to meet up in summer months? Am a member of West Linton. In return for transport will sign you in as a guest. Box SG33119. Gorgeous? Sexy? So Am I! Write Now! Lothians: Tanned, athletic, feminine professional, bored with gay scenes, waiting to meet my match! Likes wild nights out and hot nights in. Photo gets photo. Don't be shy. Tourists welcome! Box SG33129. Ayrshire Female Friends Shy sensitive sincere honest female likes quiet life. NS. Seeks similar for friendship initially. Must be down to earth with silly sense of humour. Age 30ish. Box SG33147. MEN Men Spanking Men A fully illustrated magazine containing CP stories of Men Spanking Men. 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We are medium build, clean shaven 44 and 33 and versatile in our roles. Younger partner is a virgin outside the relationship and eager to meet the right guy to help his education. Reply with photo, please, giving description of your interests. Box SG33112. Inverness Looking for that special someone to share life with or just be friends. I enjoy the cinema, country, socialising and having a good life. I'm 25, 6'2", blond with blue eyes. Drop me a line with details. Box SG33115. Highland Guy 30. Dark hair, blue eyes, 5'8", average looks/build. Searching for Mr Right. Likes nights in and nights out, cinema, books, walks etc. All replies answered. Box SG33118. I Know You're Out There! Slim, youthful, 5'8", 50 year old, SA/SL, WLTM discreet, honest, non-smoking 40-55 for fun/friendship - possible 1-2-1. Varied interests include cosy nights in and videos. Can accommodate/travel. Paisley/Glasgow. Box SG33121. Glasgow Guy in late forties ISO younger guy under 28 who is in need of a firm but loving hand OTK when required. Box SG33122. Young Gay Male Seeks others under 30 for fun, friendship, possible 1-2-1. GSOH. Photo/phone helpful. All letters answered. Good times guaranteed. Genuine replies only. Box SG33123. Ayrshire Genuine, youthful 50, good slim body, 32 waist, cute little butt, totally passive, WLTM, visit, mature discreet active top for safe fun. Likes evening meals in and watching gay videos. Box SG33125. Young, Smooth? I'm more interested in the size of your waste then the size of your waist! Older Edinburgh top seeks bottom for no strings safe fun. Total discretion assured. Box SG33126. Glasgow TS seeks guys between 30-50 for fun or maybe more. Box SG33127. West Of Scotland Bear/Dad Type Is looking for a slim chaser who prefers a meaty bottom dad. Box SG33128. Glasgow Guy 35 years old, seeks men for summer fun. WE, slim, good personality. Genuine fun lovers only. Open to first timers. Try me and take a chance on me. Box SG33130. Aberdeen - Tayside Relatively inexperienced bi-guy, 37, WLTM understanding mature male (50+) with own place for regular daytime/evening mutual fun times. Looks, size, etc unimportant. Frank letter ensures reply. Photo if possible. Box SG33133. How Big Is A Circum? Cut guy, 42, will let you find out! If you're smooth and under 26, why not see if I measure up? Box SG33134. Shy Edinburgh Guy 21, not bad looking, medium build, black hair, into nights in/out and outdoor activities, smoker, looking for men 18-25, muscular, hairy chest, SA, for 1-2-1. ALA. Box SG33135. Lonely Guys Look No Further If you are lonely and in need of love and friendship, then I am your man. 47 year old chubby guy from Falkirk. All letters will be answered. Box SG33136. Glasgow - Lanarkshire Youthful 36, 5'11", 10st, slim, 'tache, passive, GSOH, SA/SL, seeks active top for no strings fun. Bi guys welcome. Discretion assured. Box SG33137. Aberdeen - Inverness Area Good looking dom 45 year old seeks sub (18+) for fun and games. Beginner welcome. Box SG33138. Glasgow Active Guy 37 year old wants to realise fantasy of having passive guy pretend to be asleep whilst I pull back bedclothes then remove their briefs to explore, stroke and probe their naked body. Box SG33140. Are You Gay/Bi? Under 24 and looking for an older friend to visit for uncomplicated times? Get writing. Discretion assured. Box SG33141. Bikers And Skinheads Bikers or skins wanted by this very submissive 36 year old from Edinburgh. Enjoys plenty verbal, gob, w/s, boot licking and being generally used and abused. ALAWP. Can accommodate. Box SG33142. Older Mare 48, is looking for younger stallion under 26. I have the stables do you have the stamina? Box SG33143. South Scotland - Borders 45, hairy short stocky guy seeks active horny guys for fun times! Fun loving country types, discreet NS, easy going and safe. Can travel and accommodate. Days/nights. Hot deep fun. Box SG33144. Glasgow - Paisley - Kilmarnock Are you SA, NS, 18-25, slim, smooth, clean shaven attractive horny guy? Then this good looking 33 year old fit SA, WE guy is interested. Send full details with photo please. Box SG33145. Submissive Transvestite Edinburgh, 35, tall, slim, convincing, WE and experienced, WLTM horny WE man: someone to bring the woman out of me. O + A levels guaranteed. Hand written replies preferred. Love, Katrina. Box SG33148. Boot And Sock Slave Glasgow guy, 30, seeks local top to share interest in long sessions of slave training, boot and sweaty sock worship. Into bondage, rubber, Lycra. Turn me into a skinhead bootboy. Box SG33149. Paisley - Anywhere I am a 49 year old gay man, 5'11", slim, black/grey hair, looking for any man with green eyes, young or old. I have brown eyes. I am active. ALA. Box SG33151. Weightlifter If you are a weightlifter, rugby player or similar, you are warmly invited to train as my slave: CP, etc. Glasgow/anywhere. Box SG33152. Spanking Sessions Wanted 50's guy wants to take part in CP sessions - give or take. Roleplay if wanted. Can travel within Central Belt. Box SG33153. Friendly Bi-guy: Glasgow - Anywhere 40's seeking naughty boys 21-35 who require master's strict attention. Welcome XVWE, hairy. Also enjoy massage, w/s, videos. Non smoker. Reply with photos (will be returned) if you are a submissive guy, Let's meet soon. Box SG33154. Edinburgh 30 Year Old Skin Looking for passive guys into hard red fun, aromas, TT. Can travel or accommodate. Photo ensures prompt reply. Also frank letter. Box SG33155. Plump, Smooth And Under 21? Then why not get in touch with this 40 year old small hairy bear who would love to meet you! Even better if you're under 5'8" - but it's OK if you're not. Box SG33156. Shy? If the pubs and clubs don't work for you, perhaps you should try something different! I'm 43 and am looking for some regular (or one-off) safe fun with younger guy (student type perhaps) without all the hassle and noise of the scene. If you're seriously into older guys and think you fit the bill, why not get in touch? I promise you that you won't regret it! Box SG33157. Lycra Guy Dark, attractive, 23 year old seeks other young guys into Lycra shorts and thongs. Box SG33158. Let's Fall In Love Eric, aged 29, 5'3", slim, long brown hair, green eyes. Interests: clubbing, walking, cycling, reading, eating. Looking for slim 5'3" aged 25-30. Straight acting. Looking for long term relationship. Box SG33159. BISEXUAL Perth 46 year old silver bear, recently moved here from Edinburgh, seeks discreet couple for no strings uninhibited safe fun. Also looking for female for possible relationship leading to 1-2-1. Non-smokers preferred. Box SG33132. Glasgow - Paisley Good looking, fit, SA, NS, sensible, intelligent, tall, 33 year old male seeks 18-25 slim, smooth, NS, SA fun guy. Interests: pubs, music, clothes, videos, travel. Send photo and frank letter. Box SG33146. Bi Curious? There has to be a first time for everything! If you're under 21 or so, why not get in touch? Considerate experienced older guy will talk you through things at your own pace before getting down to some safe fun. Your limits respected. Total discretion assured. I have a large double bed and collection of gay videos in Edinburgh but will travel if required. Box SG33150. STRAIGHT Edinburgh 29 year old male in first flush of youth seeks congenial bi or straight woman (under 50) for no strings safe fun leading to possible (but bloody unlikely) 1-2-1 and/or marriage. ALA. Photo helps but not essential. Box SG33131. LOOKING FOR Claire Does anyone know Claire, a 5'5" woman with long brown hair from Dumbarton, works in a travel agent, age is early/mid twenties? Box SG33114. Looking For Andy Looking for Andy, recently of Carnarvon Street, Glasgow. Alan would love to see you again to relive our visits to Chinatown and our wonderful evenings together. Box SG33116. Nikki From Saltcoats Remember me? Gill from Bennets? Sunday night? Sorry, I lost you at the end of the night and I don't have your number. Call me: 07932 809409. Box SG23120. Hi Nathan! This is the guy who used to keep in touch with you. I'd like to get in touch again. M. Box SG33124. Looking For John Hillen John from Dennistoun, Glasgow: please contact Billy on 077755 65321. Lost your address. Miss you. Box SG33139. FRIENDS ABROAD Friendly New Yorker Red-headed Yank, 30 years old, 6' tall, chubby and cute. Will be visiting St Andrews and Edinburgh in July. Looking to correspond with a local bear (or bear-cub) under 40 to arrange a possible meeting. I'm educated, enjoy travelling, films, good food. Write: Sean Cullhane, PO Box 578, Mount Kisco, NY 10549-0578, USA. E-mail: 102017.343@compuserve.com. Iowa Boy Looking for Photo Swap Hi, I am a Scottish boy who is living (and grew up) in Iowa. I would love to swap pictures with Scots men age 20 to 30. I am 5'10", 147lbs, black hair and dark eyes, fair skin, goatee, pierced nips. We can exchange photos via E-mail: Deargeleo@aol.com or write: PO BOX 133, Ames, IA 50010, USA. Looking forward to hearing and hopefully seeing you! Like A Free Holiday In The Sun? If you would like to get away from the cold weather and have a free stay in Spain and you are under 35, why not give me a call? Write: Geoffrey Shean, Calle Pintor Zurbaran 27, Maravilla Fase Two, Moraira 03724, Teulada, Alicante, Spain. E-mail: gwshean@ctv.es. Significant Other Wanted Scottish-Canadian seeks compatible Scottish male in 20's to live and share business in Canada. No drug users. Must like Celtic music. Write: Charles Macpherson, Suite 481, 300, 8120 Beddington Blvd., N.W., Calgary, Alberta, Canada T3K 2A8 or E-mail: sjfs@iname.com. Visiting Glasgow June 13-25th I'm a 24 year old Puerto Rican male. I have black hair and brown eyes. I weigh 140lbs and am very attractive. I am hoping to get information on what clubs to visit etc while in town. I'd love to correspond with other gay males that are familiar with the area. Write: Horacia Alonso Jnr, 3220 NW 83rd Terrace, Miami, Florida, 33147, USA. E-mail: PUERTORBOY@AOL.COM. JOBS OFFERED Cash For Your Body Photogenic guys can earn UKP 75 cash - or UKP 100 with chest and arm definition - posing for Mike Arlen who has had 13 glossy magazines published called Mike Arlen's Guys. Send snapshots of your magnificent body to him: Mike Arlen, Wetherby Studios, 23 Wetherby Mansions, Earls Court Square, London. SW5 9BH or Phone: 020-7373 1107. Models Wanted Previously published photographer needs good looking guys (18-25) who want to earn UKP 20 per hour for publication work. For details please phone Stuart on 0141-636 6556 (No withheld numbers please) or E-mail budgie@shaws.u-net.com ACCOMMODATION Exchange Wanted I have a two bedroom flat off Leith Walk (3up). 10 mins walk from most gay pubs/clubs. Near to all amenities. I'm looking for a two bedroomed flat in Glasgow - any nice area. Phone: 0131-467 7303. SERVICES CAFFMOS Contacts and friendships for men over sixty. The organisation for the more mature gentleman and his admirers. Write to: CAFFMOS, PO Box 2273, Hove. BN3 2GF. Or phone Hove (01273) 220995 for information. Computer Services The Control Panel build and re-cycle PCs. Comprehensive Windows troubleshooting, installation and setup service also offered. Tel: 0141-649 5896. Mobile: 07010 700561. Fax: 0141-649 5786. E-mail: Enquiries@thecontrolpanel.co.uk. WWW: http://www.thecontrolpanel.co.uk/ Contact Mag Contact Mag for adults: over 900 photos. Approval copy from: Matchmaker (K38), Chorley, PR7 4BS. Or ring 01257 483335 (24 hours). CP Equipment Canes, Birches, Straps, Strops, Tawses, Paddles - all Hand Made. From as little as UKP 3. For a catalogue and order form, ring Jason Junior on Freephone 0800 9805469. E-mail: jason@jason-junior.co.uk. WWW: http://www.jason-junior.co.uk Free TV/TS News A Tranny not for profit newsletter. Views, news, venues and free personal adverts. A5 sae: BM Box 2534, London. WC1N 3XX. Gay Photosets On CD-ROM Why pay ripoff prices for gay magazines with a few pictures? Treat yourself to CD-ROMs packed with picture sets of hot hung guys. SAE for details. Box SG33104. Golden Wheel Seeking discreet gay or bisexual new friends, male or female? Long standing service, all areas and worldwide. Send stamp for details to: (Sadie), The Golden Wheel, Liverpool. L15 3HT. International Pen Friends Would you like to correspond with gay men all over the world? It is possible through INTERGAY, an international gay pen club. For info, write to: INTERGAY, Voorstraat 12-A, 4033 AD, Lienden, The Netherlands. Internet Porn Fed up clicking through endless sites looking for all the best porn, only to find yet another dead link or rip-off site?. Don't waste any more time and money - get my list of all the best FREE hardcore sites. No rubbish! No scams! No rip-offs! All sites TOTALLY free, and no credit card required. For my comprehensive listing of the web's best HARDCORE porno, send cheque/PO for UKP 9.95. Money back if not totally satisfied!! Box SG33103. Limited Companies Limited companies from UKP 90, PLCs from UKP 100. Personal Service. Cosun Formations Ltd., Freephone 0800 526421 for brochure. Safer Sex Stall The Order of Perpetual Indulgence has an up-to-date 'Safety First' stall with the latest information and goodies such as condoms and lube.Available to community events for expenses only. Contact Sister Bobby on 07881 490065. Worldwide Penfriends Regular lists. Make friends, exchange holidays, improve your languages. For general and music lovers' lists send UKP 3: "The Penpal List", c/o 221B Merton Road, Southfields, London. SW18 5EE. BACK RUBS Edinburgh - Glasgow Good looking, WE, fit and horny lad, friendly, discreet and unhurried for versatile uninhibited fun/games, escort, massage and other interests. Jason: 07974 525758. Out calls eve and weekends. Glasgow William 19, Blond hair, Blue eyes, slim & smooth. 07977 692970. Glasgow 22 - Smooth And Cute Discreet friendly service. In/out calls. 24 hours. Satisfaction guaranteed. Call Paul on 07833 375867. Glasgow - Established Masseur - 24 Professional established masseur, 24, 6ft, muscular, offers massage, escorting and alternative treatments. Showers and refreshments included. 1 hour treatment UKP 20. Call Jay for details 07931 120394 (mobile) 0141-401 8045 (home). Massage For Men Great relaxing sensual pampering by qualified genuinely caring masseur. 1 hour full body session UKP 15 - includes soothing candles, music, warm towels, shower, refreshments. Exceptionally good value. Jim. Phone 0131-556 7199. WHERE TO STAY Blackpool - St Andrews B&B 101 Park Road, only 10 mins stroll to gay scene. Very friendly. Privacy assured. Scots lads owned. Special winter rates: only UKP 12.50 pppn. Phone Doug or John on 01253 620511. Camp and Cruise Wonderful holiday opportunity on Lossiemouth sea front. Residential four berth fully-equipped mobile home near cruisy beach. WC and all facilities. UKP 150 a week all in. Phone: Elgin (01343) 542928. Gay Friendly Guest House - Edinburgh 4 star guesthouse run by gays with a mixed clientele. We are situated 1 1/2 miles from Princes Street and most tourist attractions. We have a full Scottish and continental breakfast menu. All rooms have a refreshment tray and cable TV. We have en-suite and basic rooms available to suit both budgets. A warm welcome awaits you at the Alexander. For more information, phone Glenn or Alex on 0131-258 4028. Fax: 0131-258 1247. Or E-mail: alexander@guest68.freeserve.co.uk Huddersfield Yorkshire - Gay B&B Private bungalow halfway Glasgow-London. Break your journey. Take B&B UKP 15, Sensuous Massage UKP 15, Full Service UKP 30, Eve Meal UKP 7.50. Phone me, Mediterranean guy, Sevi 01484 519245. North East Scotland Farmhouse Retreat - Bed & Breakfast Gay, non-scene, rustic, remote, private, warm relaxed atmosphere. Enjoy that extra special break you really need. Treat yourself. Discretion assured service. Details and other information: phone 01261 851154. Sutherland On A9 to Wick, B&B. Roadside. 60 miles from Inverness. Double or single. Phone: Helmsdale (01431) 821570. Tayside B&B Gay friendly B&B, riverside setting, Strathtay, 30 miles North of Perth. Double or single. STB Four Stars. Own trout fishing available. Phone: Richard on 01887 820944. The Maltings - Bed & Breakfast Small guest flat double room. Friendly Service. Homely atmosphere. Midway between Edinburgh, Dundee and Aberdeen. Phone: Peter on 01674 674148 or mobile 0831 438999. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Venues ------ ABERDEEN ABERDEEN WOMEN'S CENTRE Shoe Lane, off Queen Street. Tel: (01224) 625010. Fax: 01224 625777. Tue-Thu 10am-2pm. Where the women hang out. Lesbian group meets Wed 8-10pm. THE CITY BAR 25 Netherkirkgate. Tel: (01224) 619941. Noon-Midnight. Friendly city centre venue in side street just a few yards from the main road. WWW: http://www.citybar.co.uk/ CLUB 2000 62 Shiprow. Tel: (01224) 596999. 10pm-2am. Friendly, small and intimate pub/club. Entry charge Fri/Sat only. UKP 1 before 11pm and UKP 2.50 after with no re-entry fee. Details subject to change as the owning company is currently in receivership. COATBRIDGE PULLMANS BAR AND PUNJAB EXPRESS RESTAURANT 22 West Canal Street. Tel: (01236) 440643. Comfortable bar with restaurant upstairs. Run by Kally. Food served 11am-Midnight, children's certificate and carry out food. Popular with local LGBTs who gather through in the back room round the fire. Gay friendly, warm welcome, and no bad attitudes from the local troggies allowed. Veggie nosh and bits of dead animals for the carnivores. Live music Wed to Sun eves, Karaoke on Thu and Quiz on Sun. Nice place! DUNDEE BAR XS St Andrew's Lane (behind Liberty Nightclub). Tel: (01382) 200660. Mon-Sat 8pm-Midnight. Sun 8-11pm. Cafe/bar for lgb clientele under the same successful management as Liberty to which it has its own entrance. Cyberpoint now available. CHARLIE'S BAR 75 Seagate. Tel: (01382) 226840. Mon-Sat 11am-Midnight. Sun 12.30-11pm. Dundee's longest established gay bar. Much improved. LIBERTY NIGHTCLUB 124 Seagate. Tel: (01382) 200660. Wed-Sun 11pm-2.30am. Good atmosphere, very popular disco with wide selection of sounds and the occasional act/PA. Thursdays and Sundays are quieter - but not much. E-mail: club@liberty-nightclub.co.uk WWW: http://www.liberty-nightclub.co.uk/ EDINBURGH ATOMIX 60 Broughton Street. Tel: 0131-558 8174. 11am-7pm. A different world of gay shopping - gifts and toys for gay boyz and girlz. New look interior with exclusive new fashion ranges and developed fetish section. E-mail: atomix@tinyonline.co.uk BLUE MOON 1 Barony Street/36 Broughton Street. Tel: 0131-556 2788 (Bar) or 0131-557 0911 (Office). Mon-Fri 11am-11.30pm, Sat-Sun 9-12.30am. Food served until 10pm. Popular lesbigay cafe/bar complex. BOBBIE'S BOOKSHOP 220 Morrison Street. Tel: 0131-538 7069. Mon-Sat 10am-5.30pm. Mixed bookshop selling a selection of UK and imported gay magazines. BO'S VEGETARIAN RESTAURANT 57/61 Blackfriars Street. Tel: 0131-557 6136. Fri-Sat Noon-2pm. Daily 6-10pm. Superb little vegetarian restaurant. Friendly staff. Mixed clientele. Excellent value lunch menu. C32 CAFE 32c Broughton Street. Tel: 0131-557 2012. 10am-11pm. Stylish gay friendly licensed cafe with extensive menu including vegetarian selection. CAFE LUCIA 13-29 Nicolson Street. Tel: 0131-662 1112. Generally 10am-10pm but hours vary according to performances. Mixed bar attached to the Edinburgh Festival Theatre. Full of luvvies and their friends! CATWALK CAFE 2a Picardy Place. Tel: 0131-478 7770. Mon-Sat 11am-1am. Sun Noon-1am. Busy, stylish and gay friendly. WWW: http://www.catwalk1.co.uk/ THE CAULDRON 77 Clerk Street. Tel: 0131-622 7236. Noon-12.45am. Friendly real ale boozer frequented by omnisexual persons mainly of a Gothic persuasion. C.C. BLOOM'S 23 Greenside Place. Tel: 0131-556 9331. Mon-Sat 6pm-3am, Sun 4pm-3am. Karaoke on Thu and Sun. Male strippers Sun at 4.30pm. Disco every night from 10.30pm. CLAREMONT BAR & RESTAURANT 133/135 East Claremont Street. Tel: 0131-556 5662. FAX: 0131-558 3539. Bar: Mon-Sat 11am-1am, Sun 12.30pm-1am. Restaurant: Mon-Wed 11.30am-2.30pm and 6pm-10pm, Thu-Sat 11.30am-10pm, Sun 12.30pm-10pm. Gay owned, gay friendly and renowned for courtesy, comfort and good food. First Sat of month from 8pm: a male only night aimed at leather, denim, rubber, skinhead, uniform and bears run in conjunction with the MSC Scotland Monthly Meeting and BearScots. E-mail: robin@scifipub99. freeserve.co.uk WWW: http://www.scifipub99.freeserve.co.uk/ CLOUDS 16 Forth Street. Tel: 0131-550 3808 FAX: 0131-550 3807. A gay friendly, Edinburgh based Letting Agency offering a comprehensive & competitive service for Landlords/ Owners for long-term & short term property management. E-mail: cloudsacc@aol.com CYBERIA 88 Hanover Street. Tel: 0131-220 4403. 10am-10pm. Friendly mixed cybercafe with friendly mixed staff. Where the wired queers hang out. E-mail: edinburgh@cybersurf.co.uk WWW: http://www.cybersurf.co.uk/ DIVINE DIVA'S The Venue (Top Floor), 15 Calton Road. Tel: 0131-556 8997. Every fourth Fri - 10pm-3am. Future dates: 9th Jun, 7th Jul. Women only one nighter with all proceeds going to Edinburgh Switchboard. DOLLS At the Blue Moon Cafe, 36 Broughton Street. Tel: 0131-476 2699. Mon-Thu 3pm-Midnight, Fri-Sun Noon-late. Now open 7 days per week! Women only bar/lounge. Memberships free to all women. Small, but perfectly formed! E-mail: stoli100@hotmail.com DUST Studio 24, 24 Calton Road. Thu 11pm-3am. A mix of Goth, Rock, Industrial, Metal and Punk DJ's. UKP 2. Drinks promos. All sexualities. EDINBURGH GAY ESCORTS 19a Albany Street. Tel: 0131-558 1011. Fax: 07079 002683. Provides gay and lesbian escorts throughout Scotland. Tours of Edinburgh and surroundings. Member of the International Gay and Lesbian Travel Association. E-mail: enquiries@edinburghgayescorts.co.uk WWW: http:// www.edinburghgayescorts.co.uk EDINBURGH LESBIAN GAY AND BISEXUAL CENTRE 58a and 60 Broughton Street. Houses Atomix, Nexus Cafe-Bar, OUTRIGHT Scotland, Pride Scotland and Massage for Health. Also provides meeting and noticeboard space for many lesbigay organisations. Private mailboxes available. FANTASIES 8b Drummond Street. Tel/FAX: 0131-557 8336. Mon-Sat 10am-9pm, Sun Noon-9pm. Scotland's ORIGINAL licenced SEX shop where you'll be made welcome by the very bearish Vince (who's straight), Steve (who is a screaming butch nancy boy!), the (ever changing) Sandra or Maya (who appears as straight as Brian Souter until you get to know her). Toys galore, video rental too! Glamour shop upstairs stocks larger sizes. HABANA 22 Greenside Place. Tel: 0131-558 1270. 11am-1am. Centrally located pre club bar. HOLYROOD TAVERN 9a Holyrood Road. Tel: 0131-556 5044. Noon-12.45am. Edinburgh's best kept secret. Real ale in a gay friendly atmosphere. "If you must go on the scene, why not have some beer first?" Diverse Drinkers meet there on the first Monday of the month from 8pm - WWW:http:// www.antipope.org/feorag/drinkers/ HOT STUFF 89 Rose Street Lane North. Tel: 0131-225 7651. Noon-1am. Previously Frenchies, this vibrant gay 70's disco theme bar is in the heart of Rose Street. Karaoke Wed from 9pm. DJ "Disco Dale" Fri from 9pm. IGNITION @ THE MISSION Studio 24, 24 Calton Road. Every 4th Fri. 11pm-3am. Two floors of clubs. A major ROCK NIGHT on the first floor with Billy Ritchie. OVERLOAD - Nu Metal, alternative - on the 2nd floor. Drinks promotions. JOY Wilkie House, 207 Cowgate. JOY Info Line: 0131-467 2551. 10.30pm-3am. Every 4th Sat. Next dates: 27th May, 24th Jun. Joy, Scotland's most upfront gay club! UKP 7 members/UKP 10 non-members (reduced entry of UKP 6/UKP 9 before 11pm. E-mail: joy.scotland@virgin.net KERO-SCENE Studio 24, 24 Calton Road. Info Lines: Leaf - 0131-667 1167, Studio24 - 0836 262597. Wed. 11pm-3am. Alternative nightclub: Goth, Metal, Extreme. DJ's Leaf, Wally, Iqy, Dug. UKP 1.50 entry. E-mail: Pickle_000@hotmail.com WWW: http://connect.to/nightnews/ MASSAGE FOR HEALTH 58a/60 Broughton Street. Tel: 0131-669 8039, 0131-478 1090 or 07970 921209. By appointment only. Therapeutic massage from qualified practitioners Anne and John, range of complementary therapies. Concessions available. MINGIN' Studio 24, 24 Calton Road. Info Line: 0131-467 2551. 10.30pm-3am. Every 2nd Sat. Next dates: 4th Jun, 18th Jun. Alan Joy's club Mingin' features Alan Joy himself on the decks plus Brian Dempster. UKP 5 entry. E-mail: its.mingin@virgin.net THE MISSION Studio 24, 24 Calton Road. 11pm-3am. Every second Sat. Alternative music nightclub. Three floors of clubs, Rock, Gothic and Indie/dance, at Burn, Earth-Inferno and Mission Control. Happy Hour, Music Promos, Live Acts. Three Floors of Clubs for different people at the new MISSION alternative music nightclub. The original Rock, Gothic and Indie/dance clubs. (Burn, Earth-Inferno and Mission Control.) UKP 4/5. Happy Hour. All sexualities. The Mission is the largest alternative club in Scotland with an average attendance of 600 plus. NEW TOWN BAR 26B Dublin Street. Tel: 0131-538 7775. Mon-Sat Noon-1am. Sun 12.30pm-1am. Especially popular with Bears, but has wide clientele. Intense, the downstairs Disco is open Fri-Sat 10pm-1am. NEXUS CAFE-BAR 60 Broughton Street. Tel: 0131-478 7069. 11am-11pm. Great food and drink at reasonable prices. Internet access available. Recently tastefully refurbished. E-mail: nexus1cb@aol.com No EIGHTEEN 18 Albert Place. Tel: 0131-553 3222. Mon-Sat Noon-10pm, Sun 2-10pm. Long established sauna club for gay gentlemen! ICONS Club Mercado, 36-39 Market Street. Tel: 0131-226 4224. 1st Sun of each month. 10pm-3.30am. Themed club nights - look out for flyers. OOT: OUT ON TUESDAY Stand Comedy Club, York Place. Tel: 0131-558 7272. Second Tue of each month. 9-11pm. Monthly gay comedy club in established comedy venue. Hot food. E-mail: tommy@thestand.freeserve.co.uk/ OUT OF THE BLUE 1 Barony Street. (Downstairs at the Blue Moon Cafe). Tel: 0131-478 7048. Sun-Wed Noon-7pm, Thu-Sat Noon-8pm. Gay and lesbian store selling books, mags, videos, toys, wearing apparel, etc. PLANET OUT 6 Baxter's Place. Tel: 0131-524 0061. Mon-Fri 4pm-1am, Sat-Sun 12.30pm-1am. Food served: Fri 4pm-9pm, Sat-Sun 12.30pm-8pm. Popular and busy gay bar with friendly staff. QUEER SUNDAY @ EDEN Picardy Place. Tel: 0131-478 7435. Sun 10pm-3am. Weekly Gay Club in the centre of the Broughton Street Triangle. Two drinks for the price of one before Midnight. SASHA'S Tippler's Bar, 17 Bread St. Info Line: 07720 011032. First Sun of month. 8pm-1am. Scotland's only lesbian strip bar. Shows start 9pm. SHEBANG Wilkie House, Cowgate. Tel: 0131-557 4656. Next dates: Sat 3rd Jun, 2nd Jul. 11pm-3am. Mixed club with an all-woman DJ line up. WWW: http://www.webflyers.co.uk/shebang/ THE STAG & TURRET 1-7 Montrose Terrace. Tel: 0131-478 7231. 11am-1am. Friendly gay local just round the corner from the Solas Centre. SOLAS CAFE 2/4 Abbeymount. Tel: 0131-661 0982. Mon, Tue, Thu, Fri 11am-4pm, Wed 5-9pm. Attached to Solas National HIV Information Centre. Good home cooking (everything cooked on the premises). Vegetarians and carnivores catered for. TACKNO Club Mercado, 36-39 Market Street. Tel: 0131-226 4224. Last Sun of each month 11pm-4am. DJ Trendy Wendy. Mixed and crowded club night. TASTE Wilkie House, Cowgate. Tel: 0131-557 4656. Sun 11pm-3am. Edinburgh's only weekly House dance club with DJs Fisher and Price, Martin Valentine and Stuart Barrie. Mixed. WWW: http://www.webflyers.co.uk/taste/ THEATRE ROYAL BAR 24 Greenside Place. Tel: 0131-557 2142. Mon-Sat Noon-Midnight. Basically straight, this Real Ale Bar (formerly a Gas Board Showroom) in the middle of Edinburgh's Gay Triangle attracts a fair number of queers for an off-scene pint before heading for nearby fleshpots. TOWNHOUSE SAUNA AND GYM 53 East Claremont Street. Tel: 0131-556 6116. Noon-11pm. Scotland's largest, featuring steam room, 20 person sauna, large Jacuzzi, new Kruze Video Zone, licensed bar and cafe, free weights gym, massage by appointment. Admission UKP 8 (Concessions UKP 5), Annual Membership UKP 2. Proudly gay owned and operated. WWW: http://www.townhouse-sauna.co.uk/ UP Studio 24, 24 Calton Road. 10.30pm-3am. Every 4th Fri. Next dates: Fri 26th May, 23rd Jun. Progressive & Chunky house music to a friendly crowd. Sur-prises every month, DJs Nic Cavendish & Guests. UKP 6. E-mail: up.up@talk21.com WWW: http://www.upclub.co.uk/ WEB 13 13 Bread Street. Tel: 0131-229 8883. 9am-10pm. Informal mixed cybercafe with homely and approachable staff. 27 terminals, 2 iMacs and a text scanner. New rates: 20 mins UKP 1, 40 mins UKP 2, 60 mins UKP 3. Happy hours: 9am-11am and 8pm-10pm UKP 1.50 per hour! E-mail: queries@web13.co.uk WWW: http://www.web13.co.uk/ FALKIRK DROOKIT DUCK 16 Grahams Road. Tel: (01324) 613644. Mon-Wed 11am-3pm and 6-11.30pm. Thu 11am-3pm and 5pm-Midnight. Fri-Sat 11am-12.30am. Sun Noon-Midnight. Straight bar used by a few discrete local gays. Near to Grahamston station. GLASGOW AUSTINS 61b Miller Street. Tel: 0141-221 0444. Mon-Fri 11am-11pm, Sat 11am-Midnight, Sun 11am-10pm. Food: 11am-8.30pm. Smart plush bar. Upmarket. Overseen by Sandra and her friendly crew. Tuesday Club from 8pm with Chris Millar and guest. Glen Butler on Sat from 9pm. BENNETS DISCO 80-90, Glassford Street. Tel: 0141-552 5761. Tue-Sun 11pm-3am. Beautifully appointed busy club on two floors. Frequent PAs. Tuesdays are straight. WWW: http://www.bennets.co.uk/ BOOGIE BAR 261 Hope Street. Tel: 0141-331 1886. Mon-Sat Noon-Midnight. New gay friendly 70's bar. Meals every day from Noon till 7:30pm. WWW: http://clix.to/BoogieBar CCA Centre for Contemporary Arts @ McLellan Galleries, 270 Sauchiehall Street. Tel: 0141-332 0522. Lgbt-friendly arts complex temporarily located in the McLellan Galleries whilst their old building is being completely rebuilt to their requirements. CAFFE LATTE 58 Virginia Street. Tel: 0141-553 2553. Mon-Sat 11am-Midnight, Sun Noon-Midnight. European style diner. Relaxed atmosphere. Wide selection of pastas, pizzas and sandwiches. CENTURION SPA 19 Dixon Street. Tel: 0141-248 4485. Fax: 0141-400 1080. Sun-Fri Noon-10pm, Sat 11am-7am (All Nighter). Facilities now include 2 saunas, steamroom, Jacuzzi, gymnasium, fully equipped cafe, large rest area, luxury private rest rooms, television lounge, smoking and non-smoking lounges, free hot food, Loyalty Scheme for regular clients. E-mail: centurionspa@aol.com WWW: http://www.centurionspa.fsnet.co.uk/ CLONE ZONE 11 Dixon Street. Tel: 0141-248 2593. Mon-Sat 11am-9pm, Sun Noon-7pm. Clothes, videos, magazines, toys. In increasingly less temporary accommodation at the GGLC due to a building mishap at their Virginia Street premises to which they hope to return in September. E-mail: admin@clonezone.co.uk WWW: http://www.clonezone.co.uk/ COURT BAR 69 Hutcheson Street. Tel: 0141-552 2463. Mon-Sat 8am-Midnight, Sun 12.30pm-Midnight. Intimate bar beside former Sheriff Court. Straight until mid-evening. DELMONICA'S BAR 68 Virginia Street. Tel: 0141-552 4803. Daily Noon-Midnight. Large pub - popular with the younger crowd. Nice if your face fits. FRUITFLY The Arches, Midland Street. Tel: 0141-221 9736. Next date: Sat 17th Jun. 11pm-4am. Mixed club run by Taste from Edinburgh. WWW: http://www.webflyers.co.uk/fruitfly/ GLC CAFE/BAR GGLC, 11 Dixon Street. Tel: 0141-400 1008. Daily 11am-Midnight. Full breakfast always available. Home cooking. Friendly and busy! Big Greg with quizzes, "Who wants to be a Millionaire?", bingo and karaoke from 9pm Tue. Quiz 9pm Thu. Karaoke on Fri and Sun. GLASGOW GAY & LESBIAN CENTRE (GGLC) 11 Dixon Street, St Enoch. Tel/FAX: 0141-221 7203. Reception: 0141-400 7203. Daily 10am-Midnight. Welcomes lesbians, gay men, bisexuals and transexuals. Services include: Cafe Bar, Clone Zone shop, Info Box, Health Info, Interest Groups, Free Newspapers, Diary of Events, Reading Room, Garden of Reflection, Function space for hire and innovative Art Gallery. Increasingly busy and popular! Fully wheelchair accessible venue. E-mail: gglc1@dircon.co.uk WWW: http://www.gglc.org.uk/ also see their Art Gallery: http://www.gglc.org.uk/index2.html HYPE@MEDIA 142 Renfield Street. Mon 11pm-3am. Promising Monday one nighter in classy new nightclub. Trashy handbag and classic HI-NRG from DJ Stu. INTERNET CAFE 569 Sauchiehall Street. Tel: 0141-564 1052. Mon-Fri 9am-11pm, Sat 10am-11pm, Sun 11am-11pm. Friendly staff, mixed clientele, full Internet access from UKP 2.50 per half hour. Food served all day. E-mail: tim@linkcafe.co.uk WWW: http://www.linkcafe.co.uk/ THE LANE 60 Robertson Street Lane (off Argyle Street). Tel: 0141-221 1802. Mon-Fri 1-10pm, Sat-Sun Noon-10pm. "Exotic Gay Men's Club" with sauna and private cabins. Not as busy as it used to be. LOVE BOUTIQUE Alaska, Bath Street Lane. Tel: 0141-248 1777. 10.30pm-3am. 2nd Sat of month. Busy mixed club popular with the younger crowd. MacSORLEYS BAR 42 Jamaica Street. Tel: 0141-248 8581. Mon-Sat Noon-Midnight, Sun 12.30pm-Midnight. Glasgow's second oldest pub which is now actively seeking lgbt trade! Live music Fri and Sat eve. OOT IN GLASGOW Stand Comedy Club, 333 Woodlands Road. Tel: 0870 600 6055. Second Sun of each month. 8.30-10.30pm. Monthly gay comedy club in new comedy venue. E-mail: tommy@thestand.freeserve.co.uk PLANET PEACH Queen Street. Tel: 0141-226 8990. Mon, Tue 11pm-3am. Two nighter with DJ Shawn. Various drinks promos. Entry UKP 3 (UKP 2 with flyer). THE POLO LOUNGE 84 Wilson Street. Tel: 0141-553 1221. Mon-Fri 5pm-1am, Sat-Sun Noon-3am. Upmarket bar with low seating and hopelessly out of date web site. WWW: http://www.pololounge.co.uk/ SADIE FROST'S 8-10 West George Street. Tel: 0141-332 8005. Noon-Midnight. Bar meals Noon-7pm. A mere shadow of its former self. SILKS AND SECRETS 308 Argyle Street. Tel: 0141-572 1017. Mon-Sat 10am-5.45pm. Sun Noon-5pm. Clothes and toys catering for gay, transvestite and fetish tastes. Friendly understanding staff. Larger sizes stocked. SLAVE 288 Clyde Street. Tel: 0141-400 8280. Tue 11pm-3am. Fri 6.30pm-3am, Sat 10.30pm-3am. Sun 9pm-3am. New gay friendly club. Tue (UKP 2/UKP 3), Fri UKP 5/UKP 3, Sat UKP 7/UKP 5, Sun UKP 5/UKP 3. STAR OF INDIA 4 Howard Street. Tel: 0141-248 5002. Sun-Thu Noon-Midnight. Fri-Sat Noon-1am. Friendly Indian restaurant and cafe/bar just round the corner from the GGLC. The Evening Buffet (Sun-Wed 7-10pm) allows you to pig out for UKP 9.95! Karaoke every Thu eve. TRADE The Arches, Midland Street. Tel: 0141-221 9736. 1st Sat of month. 11pm-4.30am. The most famous club night in the UK with a host of big name DJs. Entry UKP 11 in advance, UKP 13 on door. TRON THEATRE CAFE BAR Chisholm Street. Tel: 0141-552 8587. Noon-Midnight. Friendly theatre bar. Mixed. E-mail: info@tron.co.uk WWW: http://www.tron.co.uk/ VICTORIA BAR 157-159 Bridgegait. Tel: 0141-552 6040. Daily 11am-Midnight. Basically straight, but justly popular with Glasgow's many Real Ale queens and dykes. VIOLATE PO Box 808, Glasgow. G71 7YN. Violate Club Line: 0909 46 44 112 (60p per min at all times). BDSM and general pervery. Operates in Glasgow and Edinburgh. E-mail: info@violate.co.uk WWW: http://www.violate.co.uk/ THE WATERLOO 306 Argyle Street. Tel: 0141-229 5891. Mon-Sat Noon-Midnight. Sun 12.30pm-Midnight. Semper idem! Popular, crowded, down to earth gay drinking shop. Scotland's oldest gay bar - what more can we say? Busy, busy, busy! Awarded the Betty Hutton seal of approval. INVERNESS NICO'S BAR/BISTRO Glen Mhor Hotel, Ness Bank. Tel: (01463) 234308. Wed and Fri 9-11pm. Smart relaxed bar popular with some local gays especiall y on Wednesday and Friday nights (9.15pm onwards). Mixed clientele. STATION HOTEL Station Square, Academy Street. Tel: (01463) 231926. Wed and Fri 9-11pm. Inverness's main gay-friendly establishment. Smart hotel bar. Increasingly popular with Inverness gays who are tired of putting up with the antics of a certain homophobic establishment owner. STIRLING BARNTON BISTRO 3 1/2 Barnton Street. Tel: (01786) 461698. Mon-Thu 10.30am-Midnight, Fri-Sat 10.30am-1am, Sun Noon-Midnight. (Food: Day and early evening. Near to railway station, Mixed, busy, bohemian and friendly bar/bistro Popular with students and Sons/Daughters of the Rock alike. Good food. Real Ale. TROON FREUD'S 11 West Portland Street. Tel: (01292) 318258. Wed 8pm-12.30am. 'Gay friendly night' with DJ Barron. Ayrshire's only gay venue. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- ScotsGay: a monthly magazine for lesbians, gays and bisexuals. ScotsGay 60/- Light appears in odd numbered months, whilst ScotsGay 80/- Heavy appears in even numbered months. ISSN: 1357-0595. Edited, printed and published in Scotland. (c) Pageprint Limited, May 2000. PO Box 666, Edinburgh. EH7 5JW. Non profit use by the lesbigay community of material in the magazine will normally be permitted free of charge - but contact us first for permission. We haven't had sex with most of the people who appear in the magazine, so we don't actually know what their sexuality is. Editorial: Tel: 0131-539 0666. Fax: 0131-539 2999. E-mail: scotsgay@drink.demon.co.uk. WWW: http://www.scotsgay.co.uk/ Advertising: Tel: 0131-558 1279. Fax: 0131-539 2999. 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