SCOTSGAY MAGAZINE ================= ScotsGay is a monthly magazine for lesbians, gay men and bisexuals. Edited, printed and published in Scotland ScotsGay 80/- Heavy - Issue 65 - August 2005 ELECTRONIC EDITION ***Now available on the Web: http://www.scotsgay.co.uk/ How to Subscribe and Unsubscribe information is now at the END of the magazine. All Material Copyright (c) Pageprint Publishing Limited 2005. Permission is hereby given to distribute this material provided that this copyright notice is included and that distribution is specifically for non-profitmaking reasons. Distribution for profit must be done only with prior written consent of the magazine any deviation from this will be seen as an infringement of copyright. Hardcopies are limited to one per person for personal use only and such hard copies are subject to the same copyright restrictions as laid out above. The printed edition of ScotsGay is available by post at the following rates: 6 issue sub (UK & EC) GBP8 6 issue sub (Overseas) GBP15 12 issue sub (UK & EC) GBP15 12 issue sub (Overseas) GBP28 Make Cheques and POs payable to 'Pageprint'or 'ScotsGay' and send them to: Subscriptions ScotsGay Magazine PO Box 666 Edinburgh Scotland EH7 5YW Inside this issue: Editorial News Aberdeen Glasgow Letter to the Editor Bound and Gagged Edinburgh Scottish Media Monitor Dundee Edinburgh Festival Fringe Reviews Book Reviews Fair Waved The Golden Porn International News Voice Personals Boxes - The ScotsGay Meet Market Helplines and Switchboards Listings Venues ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Editorial ========= JUDGE NOT Rex Wockner's reports in this issue on the Iranian hangings of gay youngsters (a regular occurence with more to come on 28th Aug according to Farhad Hoseini of the International Federation of Iranian Refugees). All, it seems in accordance with the Sharia law which many Moslems would like to see adopted throughout the world. Some of these are, no doubt, the Moslems who support any form of violent action that is intended to bring about this depressing state of affairs: bombings in London are just one aspect of this culture of theologically justified violence. Of course, many other Moslems roundly condemn these interpretations of their Holy Fetish Book (The Koran). It's like the USAnians with their Born Again leader George W Bush. He's a man happy to not only hang people too (especially black ones), but to spend large amounts of taxpayers' money blasting Johnny Foreigner out of the ground and then diverting even more money that's supposed to be spent filling in the holes and fixing the plumbing into the rapacious paws of companies to which he is connected. There are many Christian superstitionists (including Born Again ones) who deplore some or all of these actions. The Jewish Zionists who will tolerate no opposition to the State of Israel have their antithesis in the equally (if not more so) superstitious Torah True Jews who claim that Zionism is totally at odds with Jewish teachings. Our own dear Prime Minister is of a superstitious disposition which allows him to cuddle up to his mate GeorgeW and send UK troops to kill and terrorise people in Iraq. And to support the Met when they execute a blameless civilian, tell lies about him and send the folk that fired the shots on an all expenses paid foreign holiday. But I probably shouldn't have mentioned that last little problemette - the Met really have cleaned up their act now that we have that nice non-inhaling PC Paddick as their Pretty Pink Policeman and soft soap dispenser. Nevertheless, many Churchpeople here in the UK are up in arms at these policies too which they find are against the precepts of 'their' Holy Fetish Books (one or another of the editions of The Holy Bible). Whilst the superstitious are (in the considered opinion of this particular Atheist) just plain wrong in organising their lives around the presumed dictates of their imaginary friend or friends, only some of them are murdering bastards. The difficulty, as with the non superstitious murdering bastards, is telling the nice guys from the nasty before it's too late! There's one thing for sure: pooves, dykes and bicycles will always be amongst their principal targets. John Hein E-mail: editorial@scotsgay.co.uk --------------------------------------------------------------------- NEWS ==== WOOF! There's much mair than a bear can bare going on in Scotland later this year! From Fri 30th Sep-Sun 2nd Oct, BearScots is proud to present BearScotFest, the annual weekend event which for a few years now has been synonymous with friendship and fun. Once again, they've prepared quite an event with the relaxed atmosphere that's made BearScotFest famous. On 30th Sep, the bears will gather in Edinburgh for a weekend of fun and frolic! The highlights of this years' event include Posh Bears - a buffet dinner at the Botanics Hotel; two guided tours, two saunas, two brunches, a pub night, farewell drinks... what more could a bear ask? On Sat night, the main event - the party bears night - is at the Thomas Morton Hall in Leith. This promises to be a great night. Theme for this year is 'Cowboys'. They are expecting bears from around the world to attend and because the number of places for some of the events are limited you must pre-register on their web site at http//www.bearscots.org.uk/ From 18th-21st Nov BearScots will be heading back to Blairmore House in Argyllshire in November for a weekend of relaxation and fun in the Scottish Highlands. Only 8 miles from the bustling town of Dunoon, Blairmore can be accessed either by ferry from Gourock or by the beautiful Loch Lomond/Rest and Be Thankful road. It is ideally situated to explore the Cowal peninsula or venture further afield to the popular towns of Inveraray and Oban. There is a nine hole golf course in Blairmore and fishing (trout and salmon), sailing, walking, and numerous visitor attractions are close to hand. The house is close to the shore, not so close to the nearest shop and 1 mile to pub/hotel. Blairmore House provides the perfect venue to relax and unwind with friends. With spectacular views over Loch Long and the Firth of Clyde, three floors, and accommodation for 22 bears, you can spend the weekend secluded in luxury. You can relax in front of one of the open fires, chat to the bears, or take a dip in the indoor swimming pool. Perhaps you fancy a game of pool in the pool room? Or a relaxing session in the Jacuzzi or sauna? During the day you can take a trip to one of the many nearby attractions, from the arboretum at Benmore to the castle at Inverary. Perhaps you would rather stop at a country hotel or pub for a meal of fresh trout or salmon? For those who are even more adventurous, Quadmania, just along the road from Blairmore House, a wide range of actionpacked activities from quad-bikes to abseiling, rock climbing, canoeing, kayaking, sailing, rib-boat adventure, archery, gorge walking and more. GETTING THERE Getting there couldn't be easier. Although set in such an isolated location Blairmore House is only two hours from Edinburgh and only thirty miles from Glasgow Airport. By public transport there is a connecting service by train to Gourock, then ferry to Dunoon, and a connecting bus service right to the door. For those traveling long distances we may be able to arrange to pick you up from Glasgow Airport or railway stations. There is plenty of private parking. 10 NOT OUT MCC Metropolitan Community Church of Edinburgh celebrated 10 years of ministry in Scotland on Sunday 17th Jul. The Congregation is part of the worldwide Metropolitan Community Church Movement founded by Rev Troy Perry in 1968 and the Edinburgh Congregation was founded inJuly 1995, a month after the first Pride Scotland March and Festival, as a result of a visit to the Pride by some MCC clergy from England. MCC is an inclusive Christian Church with a special affirming ministry within the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender communities, open to all people irrespective of sexuality or gender identity. Over the past 10 years, MCC Edinburgh has provided a safe space to worship God and has helped many couples seek God's blessing on their covenant together. The Church has been on the front line of many justice struggles - especially the fight for equal rights of gender and sexual minorities in Scotland - and its people have appeared on television and radio and in the press and have given evidence to the Scottish Parliament and met with ministers and other politicians on several occasions. HELP WANTED The issue of Civil Partnerships and gay marriage is constantly in the news at the moment. However, there is very little known about what lesbians and gay men, who are contemplating Civil Partnership/ marriage, really think. A research project based at the University of Leeds is hoping to fill this gap in our knowledge. The research team want to interview lesbians and gay men who have already held a commitment ceremony, registered their partnership, or are planning to. They hope to find out what kinds of rituals are important to lesbians and gay men, as well as the impact social and legal recognition of their partnerships will have. If you would like to be interviewed, please contact Beccy Shipman on 0113-343 4903 or E-mail: r.shipman@leeds.ac.uk TRADE Pete Himsworth has launched a new Trade Night at Mood - details at http://www.grooveklub.co.uk/ PRIME TIME Prime Time was started up by Steve O'Donnell from Gay Men's Health along with two other men last October. Initially a monthly group, it is now held every 2nd Sun at the LGBT Centre for Health and Wellbeing at 9 Howe St, Edinburgh from 2-4pm, and is an open, non profit, non political, non religious social/discussion group for men aged 40+. On average there are 10-14 gay/bisexual men whenever they meet. See Listings for further details. FIFE MEN SURVEY As a result of complaints about homophobic B&B owners over the G8 and Make Poverty History month, the Fife Men Project is conducting a survey of all accommodation and venues in Fife. The results will be available on the website with recommended accommodation together with an education campaign for those not operating a equality policy. WWW: http://www.fifemen.co.uk/accommodation/ accommodation.html JOBS FOR THE BOYS AND GIRLS LGBT Youth Scotland which describes itself as "a leading national youth charity working towards the inclusion of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) young people in the life of Scotland" has a job going in Glasgow. Like to be an Outreach Co-ordinator (37 hours, AP4: £20,808 - £23,034 + pension)? Then download a pack from http://www.lgbtyouth.org.uk/content/ resources/download.asp?id= 108 or see our Listings for contact details. LEGAL SURGERY Fiona Cook, a solicitor, will hold a monthly surgery in the Glasgow LGBT Centre on the following dates: 27th Aug, 24th Sep and the 29th Oct. Please be advised appointments are booked on a first come first serve basis. To make an appointment contact the Centre offfice on 0141-221 7203. The first half hour consultation is free. INDIGO The popular Aberdeen boozer now as its own website - WWW: http://www.bar-indigo.com/ POLICE CALL Constable Izzi Hussene (Strathclyde Police Diversity Officer, A Division) is available in the Glasgow LGBT Centre for confidential advice and support and for the reporting of homophobic crimes or other related subjects from 7.30-9pm on the last Tue of each month. PUSHING THE BOAT OUT Sat 3rd Sep is the date of Mingin' Ahoy!, the infamous boat trips on the Forth. Tickets for the cruise on the Forth cost £15 which includes coach travel from Edinburgh to South Queensferry and back, three hours sailing up and down the Forth accompanied by a thumping sound system and then free entry to Mingin' afterwards. Tickets are available from The Regent Bar. For those not on the boat trip, entry to Mingin' is £5 before midnight, £6 after. Next Mingin' date Saturday Sep 17th. FUNNY GUYS Calling All Comedians! LGBT Youth Scotland needs all you funny people out there to take part in a comedy night which they're holding to raise funds. To help, they're organising three comedy workshops where you'll be able to practice your act and look at the work of other comedians. For more information: http://www.lgbtyouth.org.uk/ KEEPING IT CIVIL Come along to a free information session at Glasgow LGBT Centre which will clarify the new laws on civil partnership. A financial advisor will be present and will give a short presentation and a question and answer session will follow. To be held on Mon 5th Sept from 7pm in Jackie Forster room. To book a place please contact the Centre either by phone 0141-221 7203 or E-mail admin1@glgbt.org.uk GENDER RECOGNITION The General Register Office for Scotland has a new page on their website to explain how they will issue replacement birth certificates to people who get gender recognition: http://www.gro-scotland.gov.uk/ regscot/gender-recognition.html Information about how to apply for gender recognition is available from http://www.grp.gov.uk/ ROBIN COOK Gregan Crawford writes: It was Robin Cook who introduced the amendment to the Criminal Justice (Scotland) Bill (a 'consolidation' bill) that resulted in the legalisation of homosexual acts between consenting adults (over 21) in Scotland. He moved the 'New Clause 1' for second reading on 22nd Jul 1980. Robin Cook was a vice president of SMG, along with Malcolm Rifkind in the early days. Rifkind was fairly useless but Cook was a good friend to the gay community (both Cook and Rifkind started as Edinburgh 'toon cooncillors' before becoming MPs for Edinburgh Central and Edinburgh Pentlands respectively). I remember discussing with Cook how best to achieve law reform over a couple of pints in Broughton Street many years ago! John Hein adds: I always wondered why Cook was so helpful to the gay cause. Following publicity about his own love life, I came to the conclusion that it was a welcome form of Shaggers' Solidarity! BIG BREATHS! Breathing Space is a national, free, confidential phone-line to call when feeling down or stressed. 0800 858587. WWW: http://www.breathingspacescotland. co.uk/ BLESSED ARE THEY (Pic) Lisa and Alan receive a blessing at the Regent from the Order of Perpetual Indulgence. This was for the munificence of their punters and their contributions to OPI funds rather than for the quality of their beer for which no blessings could suffice! --------------------------------------------------------------------- ABERDEEN - Obar Dheadhainn ========================== Hi there, and here is this month's round up of what's happening North of anywhere. With only a few months before the opportunity to exercise your right to register your partnership under the civil partnership act it saddens me to notice the offer of 'secret' civil partnership services. Just when we think the LGBT community is taking great steps forward there is a painful reminder that there is still much to do. For never has the Scottish Executive offered us a greater opportunity to stand up and officially recognise our relationships. The act may not be to everyone's liking and 'disgusted of deepest Donside' may have a few words to say when they see that Mr and Mr X have got hitched at the local registrar, but I believe that there is no more legislation that can greater enhance the LGBT community. Acceptance of LGBT actors in soaps and performers on the likes of Big Brother have not contributed to an increased visibility of LGBT people on the streets in this corner of the world. It is now up to couples to stand up and say 'My relationship is legitimate in the eyes of the law and this is how I intend to live my life'. I recognise the right to a quiet life for everyone but there will always be homophobes in our community. While it may have been possible to elope a generation ago, I think that now with the greater emphasis on media and communication the offer of a 'secret' ceremony may need to be taken with a pinch of salt. Everyone from the butch lesbian to the effeminate guy and everyone in between has a role to play in shaping the future of our community in the North East of Scotland. From a recent copy of the Press & Journal - "There are 10 registrars here and only one has concerns on religious grounds. The rest of us will go ahead with the ceremonies." So there you go! The Aberdeen press certainly seem to be up on the happenings in the gay community these days. Having just spoken to Wellman's director Rod Brown and promised a scoop on the relocation of Wellman's Health Suite I discovered that the city's Evening Express had run the same story on that very day. For those of you that don't know the buildings around Wellman's including the former Satrosphere on Justice Mill Lane are set to be demolished to make way for a "better Aberdeen". Wellman's will be relocating to a quieter site on Holburn Street at the site of an (almost) former motorcycle shop. The new twofloor base could provide a gym, treatment rooms, a sauna, steam room and spa bath. But, a fact omitted by the Evening Express is that the Health Suite is exclusively for men especially those that like other men. The new premises are planned to be open by Xmas. For the moment though, Wellman's continues to be open on the top floor at 21-23 Justice Mill Lane, Aberdeen. The next women's disco will be held on Fri 16th Sep from 8pm with Soul Food at the East Neuk bar on King Street. Contact Granite Sisters at http://www.13.clara.co.uk/ for details. I don't have an update from the extra-ordinary general meeting regarding the closure of the Women's Centre held last week but this notice comes from Yvonne of the Lesbian & Friends Lunch club: I don't quite know how to start this message. After a lot of debate and a lot of looking, after a lot of emotions, I have to inform you all that the Lunch Club has to come to a close. Because Aberdeen Women Centre is going to close we have lost our premises, and we have been looking and trying to find something that was half-suitable. And, it is with regrets that we failed. And, that I do not have any other choice than to close us down. The offered space we thought might have done it (PHACE) is not in any way a possibility. My question to you all is, could you please spread the message to women who are not in this community. Because of how it was run we don't have addresses or even contact numbers. Thank you all for the support over the last couple of years and for the happy memories I hope it brings in mind. A special thanks in the first place to Pauline. Thank you Pauline for all your work and involvement, and this also goes for Nicola, thank you your puds were the best. Thank you all. Yvonne. The Grampian Gender Group is a support/help group for trans-people. They meet once a month in Aberdeen and have done so now for several years. They provide a safe place to meet for informal chat, a place to dress if you choose and also occasional speakers and people coming along that can give help or support. The next meeting will be their AGM and will be held on Sat 20th Aug from 12 noon. Their main point of discussion will concern the future of the group. For further details, please E-mail: gillian_abdn@yahoo.co.uk A few of us had a pleasant days outing to Clachnaben as part of the LGBT Sports Club on Sun 14th Aug. We parked just above the Bridge of Dye and ascended the steep slope to the summit. With the weather clearing and the sun coming out, we stopped for lunch and took in the panoramic views. From there we continued on to another path that took us back down into the valley for a circular route along the River Dye. A meeting at the Phace offices on Thu 18th Aug at 8pm will discuss future events for this club. For the summer visitor the other prominent gay venue in Aberdeen is Bar Indigo (Oh Henry's). Situated at the end of the Adelphi - a rather quaint lane off the bottom end of Union Street - Bar Indigo is open seven nights a week with a variety of DJs during the week and drinks promotions between 9pm and 11pm. They celebrate their 2nd birthday on Sat 20th Aug with an Ultra Violet night. There is free entry to those with UV body paint and prizes for the best birthday suit. Of course, that reminds me of another important anniversary that I must go and do something about... Tivoli E-mail: Tivoli_abdn@yahoo.co. uk ------------------------------------------------------------------------- GLASGOW - Glaschu ================= Is it nearly September already? Well, 'skinny rib' and badly fitting shorts can mean only one thing, our summer is all but done! The end of July saw the welcome return of Revolver Bar's 'boot camp.' Bootshines and headshaves, well with clippers rather than a razor, were available on the night with proceeds going to 'Phace Scotland,' a good time was had by all and it looks like it's a bimonthly event now (Fri 30th Sep is the next chance you have to dust off those combats!). Ron, John and all the staff look forward to seeing you there. As for BURLY! the near naked foam party in the Arches on the night of the 5th of Aug was wild! A few brave souls did indeed strip down to the bare shorts, trunks and what evers! A clever wee bag for all your stuff, was a great idea, the staff looked a bit bewildered really, but as usual they did their job well. Music was done by DJs Raymond and Hi-fi Sean. I have made no secret of the fact that I LOVE nights like this, real men, a bit of dressing up and loads of fun. Once upon a long time ago the word GAY was defined as fun, fun, fun and more fun! A few more nights like this would do Glasgow no harm, let's face it: not everyone is 18 with a 28 inch waist and would we want that anyway? Club Devotion, with DJ Annie and her mix of chart and soul, is still as popular as it was with the younger crowd and those that like the odd nibble on chicken! Bennets has picked up big time and the Waterloo is safely gay and as busy as ever. The Polo is sticking with its tried and tested weekly mix, having said that it's the only location with a 'T-Lady' night on a Wed! Stitch and Bitch (Glasgow Women's Library, 109 Trongate, 0141-552 8345) is on every second Tue, (next on 13th Sep). It may sound like a nightmare (when I heard about it I thought it was a reference to Casualty!) but I do recall my female family members talking about knit and crochet stitch. I can't, however, seem to recall if it made them any calmer! If you fancy a wee moan why not pop in, all ages and needle size welcome! If you happen to be in the East End, (yes, I said East, the West is next month), pop into the St Mungo Museum of Religious Life and Art. Marvel at the wonder that is the St John of the Cross, have a wee peppermint tea in the Buddhist garden and gaze upon 'Women and War'! Jenny Matthews photographs are breath taking, shot in black and white, these images show conflicts from Afghanistan to South America and beyond. Taken from 1982, her eye is cast across a sea of despair and we are left with only the few notes she has been good enough to provide to guide us. If you liked 'Venus Rising' at the Burrell, you will love this different account of the beauty of the female form! And now and most humbly! May I apologise for my error of failing to report that Nik McNicol was voted unanimously to the board of directors of the LGBT Centre in Glasgow. I would also like to take the time to say sorry to my long suffering editor and chief for failing to make 'copy date' last issue and last but not least to all of you for same. I can only blame 'tech' stuff (I must have a homophobic lap top!) and a wee bit of tummy upset. BUT! This is all set to change! With the aid of a poor unsuspecting college (nothing to do with young, fit students you understand!) I will master the key pad once and for all! Well, that's all that I have heard, seen, been told and had screamed at me! Till our next merry meeting, this witch must fly! Criz E-mail: criz@drink.demon.co.uk ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Letter to the Editor ==================== Dear Editor Your "Edinburgh Scene" reporter says that he is finding it hard to make "the same things" sound exciting after three and half years writing the column - I don't think many of your readers will disagree, not that the scene is necessarily boring but that "wee Alan" certainly doesn't seem to have the journalistic talents to bring the subject to life! Let me deal with two issues arising from his August 2005 musings. Firstly, what a missed opportunity to write an interesting, lively and intelligent column for the hundreds of thousands of people who flock to Edinburgh for the myriad festivals - ok not all will be queer and read ScotsGay but surely a better effort could have been made to engage our visitors, desperate to part with their pink Pounds, Dollars, Euros et al. And what about helping them have a good time with decent reviews of what Edinburgh offers? I'm sure many of your readers were ecstatic to read about Maddona and Gerri Halliwell but what the hell they specifically have to do with Edinburgh in August is beyond me! Perhaps he has his sights set on a job with Attitude (and I mean the mag, he already has the character it seems)! Which brings me to his "review" of one of Edinburgh's longest establishment gay bars, the New Town where I just so happen to be a regular, oh dear just one of the many places I could say I visit regularly - my poor liver! I have to say if I were management in the place, I would be getting a wee lawyer's letter off to the publishers. On the first hand, not one of the regulars or staff I spoke to has seen your correspondent in the bar this year, and certainly if he has "sneeked in" not often enough to make the inaccurate and frankly daft assertions that he has. And believe me the clientele is as varied as most other places I go - and I thought this millenium we were all about tolerance and not judging anyway? I wonder what you have to do or be in "wee Alan's" book to be described as "seedy" or "older"? So all in all, from an un-scientific poll of New Town punters (aged 18 to 48) - no problem "Wee Alan" if one of the busiest bars on the Edinburgh scene is not to your liking - stay away but at least get ScotsGay to send a reviewer with an open mind who can write accurately, funnily and engaging. Faithfully Douglas McBean -------------------------------------------------------------------- Bound and Gagged ================ Welcome pervs and pervesses to another instalment of my slap happy BDSM column. Quite a few changes this month, as we see several clubs moving venue for a variety of reasons. So pay attention if you do not wish to end up looking a complete prat. As has been noted by a number of individuals this column has been absent for a few editions. Well, listen up, this Bitch ain't goin' nowhere. I speak my mind and tell it how it is, you don't like it tough titty. If nothing much is going on then why should I bother my arse writing a column? You want this to be a regular feature, then tell me what the fuck is going on and I will report it in this fine periodical. Okay. First up is news of The Glasgow Munch, which is moving to the Admiral Bar on Waterloo Street. The Hogshead is being refurbished and we wish them good luck for the future and thank the excellent staff for helping to make the Munch such a success. So, as per normal, the Munch will run from 8pm until kicking out time on the 4th Thu of the month. Your meeters and greeters are Bumhug and Simply D, lovely people and very welcoming. As you go through the main entrance, simply go down the stairs to the lower bar and look for the table with the little teddy bear sitting on it. Dress code is street clothes or casual wear. You will notice from the above example that people often use a pseudonym, mine for example is Mistress Anya. Next up: no change for the excellent Munch in Edinburgh. It is held at Ryries Bar on the corner of Dalry Road and Haymarket Terrace. The Munch is held in a separate room, so just buy your drinks at the bar, go to the right hand end of it and up the stairs. The Munch is in the room at the top, just go on in. It's held on the third Thu of each month, from 8pm until close. Dress code is street clothing or casual wear. Now onto the clubs. 'Rebound' a very popular Glasgow club has moved to The Bastille Bar formerly known as Sloan's Bar. This venue is in a prime city centre location and absolutely awesome, the entire first and second floors are taken over by the club. The original fixtures and fittings make a stunning contribution to the ambience, which resembles a decadent turn of the century party in a country house. The next date, for this not to be missed club is Sat 20th Aug. 'Rebound' is ideal for those who like their perversions served straight with a twist! Doors open at 8pm and close at 1am, The entrance fee is £10 on the door. Location is The Bastille Bar/Sloan's 1st floor, Buchanan Lane, off Buchanan St, Glasgow (10 mins walk from George Square and Queen Street Station). Dress code is fetish and/or black. Now to an old favourite: club 'Violate' which next takes place on Sat 3rd Sep at the Big Joint, 1084 South Street, Scotstoun. A very popular event, this club welcomes a mixed crowd of all ages. Music is provided by DJ Loveless - a mix of Dance and Rock. A play area is set up in the large back room and food is included in the ticket price. As an introduction to the BDSM scene, this club night is ideal. Doors open at 8pm - club runs until 2am (doors close at Midnight). Tickets are £10 on the door or £5 for members. Annual membership is available on the door at £10. Discount news, you can get 10% off products from the Juju website. Don't forget that your Violate membership card will also get you 10% off in Cyber on Kings Street. Also Me-licious, Joy 4 Us and all UK outlets of Clone Zone. Yet another club that has moved is 'Nightshade' based in Edinburgh. It is now held at the The Lighthouse Studios, at 20 West Harbour Road in Granton, just along the road from Granton Square. There is a separate area for equipment with a main socialising area near the bar. The next date is Fri 19th Aug, tickets are £6 for members and £8 for nonmembers. Fetish dress code or choose to wear the monthly theme. No jeans! Background music, with no dance area. A Players club. WWW: http://www.nightshade-club.org/ Finally for this issue, we have DV8: a monthly fetish club held in the atmospheric cellars of the Spiders Web Pub on Morrison Street, Haymarket, Edinburgh. Entry price is only £5 for members. Membership costs £10 for a year and is available to anyone who has been to at least two previous DV8 events. Guests can be brought in by members for £10 each. The doors open at 8pm and you may pose on the equipment for your own photos until the Club starts at 9.30pm which then runs until 1am. No cameras (including cameras on phones) allowed from 9.30pm onward. Any questions or venues you would like listed contact me on my E-mail address below. You can also reach me on the following forums: http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/ or http://www.bondage.com/ I am registered as Mistress_Anya. You know what they say about payback? Well I'm the bitch! Mistress Anya E-mail: Mistress_Anya@drink.demon.co.uk ---------------------------------------------------------------------- EDINBURGH - Dun Eideann ======================= 'Mariners' the home of 'Velvet Women's Club Night' & 'Burly Too' is Licensed to conduct Civil Partnerships; 'Mariners' embraces our diverse LGBT community; It's unique; new; & seriously up-market it's 'Mariners'. Every so often, in Edinburgh, a new bar, restaurant or Night-Club opens that seems to capture the imagination of the city's socialites. Few that have appeared over the past few years come close to the versatile and open minded 'Mariners'. It's got to be one of the most adaptable and flexible venues in the city; one of those places that has to be seen to be believed. 'Velvet Women's Club Night' & 'Burly Too' have been vastly improved with their new home; proven by customers turning out in their droves. 'Mariners' is Scotland's premier and dedicated Civil Partnerships Venue; the LGBT community's ceremonial home. Book and plan your Civil Partnership and Function at 'Mariners' with the assistance of The Velvet Team, contact - Email: clubvelvet@blueyonder.co.uk The landmark Civil Partnership Act will be brought into force on 5th Dec this year. Any couple wishing to form a civil partnership will be able to give notice of their intention to register at a Register Office from that date. This will allow the first civil partnerships to be formed in time for Christmas on 21st Dec 2005, after the 15 day waiting period has passed. The Civil Partnership Act allows same-sex couples to make a formal, legal commitment to each other. At present, same-sex couples have no way of gaining formal legal recognition for their relationship and as a result suffer a range of problems in their everyday lives. Important rights and responsibilities will flow from entering a civil partnership, helping same-sex couples to organize their lives together. The process of entering into a civil partnership will be administered by the local registration service. On the day of registration, each member of the couple will sign in the presence of the registration officer and two witnesses. The Act also allows for same-sex couples who have entered legally recognized overseas relationships to be treated as civil partners in the United Kingdom 'Mariners' seems the perfect place to book your Civil Partnership and Function; a spectacular split level venue set in a stunning Converted Church in the heart of the Gay Residential Sector (located on Commercial Street, Leith, Edinburgh); particularly when it's so spectacularly lit up in the evenings and boasts a beautiful Modern Stained Glass Window set in the centre of two enormous spires. They have spared no expense in creating a truly spectacular interior. Many original features have been retained and the decor really is a clever mix of traditional and contemporary styles giving it a unique ambiance with a clean modern feel. The building is laid out over two floors, with a bar on each, and a large balcony overlooking the dance floor. The upper level is accessed by a staircase stretching the length of the dance-floor. Large comfy couches, scattered tables and cosy booths offer a variety of ways to relax and enjoy. Careful use of lighting has insured that 'Mariners' can have a coffeehouse ambience during the day and in the evening it is transformed into a state of the art Night-Club with a superior sound and lighting system, with plasma screens throughout. Also the menu has something for everyone; from flame grilled steaks and burgers to seafood, pizza, pasta and much more; with promotional prices on drinks and food and great music. Wow is all we can say, check it out folks... Jinx & Carpe Diem (Wee Alan is on holiday) ------------------------------------------------------------------- Garry Otton says LET'S SHOW MARRIAGE the FUTURE =============================================== I'm a law-abiding citizen, on the whole. A few minor incursions with speed cameras and then there was an incitement to impersonate a police officer (full uniform supplied). I wasn't charged for the latter. Well... Not officially, anyway! Respect the law. It is a message I would extend to these renegade councils who, at taxpayers' expense, are threatening to permit only civil registration of same-sex marriage and deny participants a ceremony. Religious extremist Gordon Macdonald, parliamentary officer for Christian Action, Research and Education (CARE) whinged in The Sunday Herald: "MSPs didn't properly debate this issue in the first instance, it was pushed down to Westminster because the parliament didn't want something controversial being discussed here. People haven't been able to express their views about this. Our concern is that civil partnerships were setting up a system that was essentially mirroring marriage. We disagree with this in principle... There is also an issue about ceremonies. This was purely about registration and now certain groups are calling for ceremonies as a means to suit their own agenda. This shouldn't be changed and this is another reason why the matter should have been more fully debated at the time". If you don't like gay marriage, Mr Macdonald, then don't fucking marry one! Full stop. End of! There is nothing to discuss. Our so-called 'Scottish Parliament' took that quite literally, of course, and left Westminster to deal with it. I want my taxes back! All it would have taken was a few tweaks in Scottish law and 'marriage-lite' would've only been something gays did in England before reaching Gretna Green. Now we have been awarded one of those 'special rights' moral conservatives crow on about because civil partnerships are denied to 'straights'. What part of the word 'equality' does the Scottish Executive not understand? Full marriage would've blessed gays with an excuse to flick through the latest wedding magazines, awarded religionists the chance to deny gay men the pleasures of promiscuity and given marriage the makeover it so desperately needs. Scotland would be a great country if it had only half the courage The Corries used to sing about. When Spain challenged the Catholic Church, which had a history of collusion with Franco's former fascist regime, to deliver equality to all its citizens, it did so with gusto. Spanish gays now qualify for all the same rights enjoyed by heterosexuals, including adopting children. It is certainly not strange, but true that a lot of gays love kids. (News of an Austrian father of 12 who left his wife for a male lover did nothing to undermine the opinion of The Sunday Mail who qualified the tale for their "strange but true" section). The Spanish Socialist Prime Minister Jose Luis Rodriquez Zapatero put the full prestige of his office and party behind the passage of full gay human rights legislation in his country and a top government official attended its first gay marriage ceremony. In parliament, Zapatero quoted two gay poets in his speech. (Jack McConnell attending the first gay wedding quoting passages from our gay Scottish Makar? I don't think so)! Zapatero told his parliament: "We are not legislating, honourable members, for people far away and not known by us. We are enlarging the opportunity for happiness to our neighbours, our co-workers, our friends, and, our families. At the same time, we are making a more decent society because a decent society is one that does not humiliate its members. In the poem 'The Family', the poet Luis Cernuda asked: 'How can man live in denial by giving rules that prohibit and condemn?' Today, the Spanish society answers to a group of people who, during many years, have been humiliated, whose rights have been ignored, whose dignity has been offended, their identity denied, and their liberty oppressed. Today the Spanish society grants them the respect they deserve, recognises their rights, restores their dignity, affirms their identity, and restores their liberty. It is true that they are only a minority, but their triumph is everyone's triumph. It is also the triumph of those who oppose the law, even though they do not know it yet: because it is the triumph of liberty. Their victory makes all of us, even those who oppose the law, better people. It makes our society better. Honourable members, there is no damage to marriage or to the concept of the family in allowing two people of the same sex to get married. On the contrary, what happens is this class of Spanish citizens get the potential to organise their lives with the rights and privileges of marriage and family. There is no danger to the institution of marriage, but precisely the opposite: This law enhances and respects marriage. Today, conscious that some people and institutions are in profound disagreement with this change in our civil law, I wish to express that, like other reforms to the marriage code that preceded this one, this law will generate no evil, that its only consequence will be the avoiding of senseless suffering of decent human beings. A society that avoids senseless suffering of decent humans is a better society. With the approval of this bill, our country takes another step in the path of liberty and tolerance that was begun by the democratic change of government. Our children will look at us incredulously if we tell them that many years ago, our mothers had less rights than our fathers, or if we tell them that people had to stay married against their will even though they were unable to share their lives. Today we can offer them a beautiful lesson: Every right gained and each liberty has been the result of the struggle of many people that deserve our recognition and praise. Today we demonstrate with this bill that societies can better themselves and can cross barriers and create tolerance by putting a stop to the unhappiness and humiliation of some our citizens. Today, for many of our countrymen, comes the day predicted by Kavafis (Ancient gay Greek poet) one century ago: 'Later 'twas said of the most perfect society that someone else, like me, will come out and act in the spirit of freedom, and be rewarded'." Scotland, take note! The first 'gay marriages' - and, please, let's start calling them that if it's going to get up the noses of religionists - will be taking place on 20 December. Amongst them Aberdeen-based John Stewart and Neil Fletcher, both Lib Dem representatives on Aberdeen City Council who have been together for 13 years and tiara and tantrums aside, Elton John and David Furnish, who expect to be 'tying the knot' the following day. I'm just back from Amsterdam. One hot, sunny afternoon, I sat by myself drinking coffee at the edge of a canal in the Jordaan district, near the Homomonument and the Westerkerk. The sun glinted off chrome spokes of bikes tied to the iron railings of a canal bridge. I was listening through my mp3 player to Dutch pop artist Rob de Nijs singing 'Inch Allah'. I don't know why, but I felt uneasy. I'd been talking with friends. This country, so proud of its liberal traditions, is at war. The country appears to be defending itself against a new moral conservatism imported by immigrants. A gay map, handed out to gay tourists with a personal welcome from the mayor of Amsterdam, Job Cohen, warns: "Do not change any money on the streets! This is a known rip-off from east-European thieves". There is widespread mistrust amongst people towards immigrants, particularly Muslims, and it is very open. There have been arson attacks on Mosques in retaliation for the murder of filmmaker Van Gogh by a Muslim extremist and prior to Gay Pride; I heard rumours that the canal boat parade might be a target for attack. One resident, living in Amsterdam with his Egyptian boyfriend told me: "They are guests in our country and they have just pissed in the corner! They are our guests and they've abused our hospitality!" I can't pretend to know the answers; I know I abhor racism; that is a certainty, although I cannot tolerate the barbaric practices of primitive theocracies that undermine women and sexual minorities and pay scant regard for the human rights its citizens. As for the West, with greater liberties come greater responsibilities. That's not quoting anybody; it's just what I believe. It gives me some room to curse the Internet spammers while I excuse the ranters. With the rise of Islamofascist regimes and nasty clips of Islamic fundamentalists blasting bodies to smithereens circulating the Internet, I'm not sure I can hold that thought for very much longer. The Scottish Media Monitor has never supported censorship and defends the right to criticise religion. Gerald Warner, Mrs Grant, John MacLeod and their ilk are all entitled to air their opinions in the Scottish media. It is the Scottish media that has shirked its responsibility to ensure that the presentation of news and opinion is balanced and fair. News stories snatched from press releases from the Christian Institute or the Catholic Church and the plethora of religionist columnists have guaranteed a solid, conservative media, excluding truly liberal voices, censoring language and stifling sharp opinion. New laws censoring hatred of religion has created a climate that will make it difficult for the Scottish Media Monitor to continue. And time is running out. Recently, the editor of The North East Weekly told The Herald he had been charged by police under Section 19 of the Public Order Act after penning an editorial, "Perverts and Refugees", criticising the setting up of a refugee centre near Buchan. Section 19 gives the police power to arrest persons they suspect of publishing or distributing written material that is threatening, abusive, or insulting and likely to stir up racial hatred. Had he been obliged to carry an alternative opinion, there would have at least been an element of balance in his paper. But to be silenced altogether, then there is no voice at all. Another editor, Tom McConigley, is being investigated by police over an article headed "Gypsy Fear" in The Barrhead News after a report on 35 French travellers who had settled at Blackbyres after arriving from Ireland. There's no end to it. Scotland on Sunday reported how the Kirk was attempting to close the Edinburgh Dungeon. They apparently think it promotes Satanism and are challenging the renewal of its entertainment licence because the church in the city's London Road feels the displays are offensive to Christians. "The Kirk session of the church has complained about elves impaled on spikes, roasting robins and Father Christmas boiling in a witch's cauldron... The Christians claim the associations with evil are at least corrupting and at worst something that could lead to devil worship". After describing the ghoulish exhibits in such minute detail, I would suggest they stop going there. Or is that too simple for the Rev William Armitage? He told the paper: "...You can go too far. The way that evil is made out to be something positive is deeply troubling. Evil is something very powerful and should not be trivialised". Malcolm Dickson, the session clerk at the Parish church added: "We felt that it was time to make our voices heard... If this display had been aimed at any other religion it would have been closed down. People seem to think they can get away with this because it's Christianity". Does he mean like the blasphemy law that can only be used by Christians and which has only been used in modern times to prosecute gays? Maybe we could include amongst the exhibits some of the equipment religionists have used for torture and punishment over the ages? Finally, after a few words at the Civic Forum's meeting on media in Glasgow I'm pleased to say, but for a bit of grumbling from The Scottish Daily Mail, BBC Radio Scotland has now moved Thought For The Day, a piece of religionist propaganda that regularly interrupted the morning news, to some hopelessly early slot before the alarm goes off! E-mail: garry@scottishmediamonitor.com Read the papers, post your comments or search for material at the SCOTTISH MEDIA MONITOR website: http://www.scottishmediamonitor.com ScotsGay supports the work of Outrage! P O Box 17816, London SW14 8WT. Donations welcome. http://www.outrage.org.uk / CUT IT OUT... The bombings. And the answers, Gerald Warner-style in Scotland on Sunday: "We need to respond to this crisis in two ways. For the most immediate is a no-nonsense response to terror. For the human rights, multiculturalist lobby the party is over. Forty years of political correctness have had fatal consequences for 55 people: more will die, unless we act ruthlessly... The secular jihad must stop too". Alan Taylor in The Sunday Herald on cruising (described by straights as 'dogging'). "A colleague, who has a purely professional interest in such matters, tells me that Arthur's Seat is a favourite haunt for alfresco coupling. Walking around the crags one night recently he came across four separate sets of copulators, which he claims is a record. None of them seemed in the least perturbed by his presence as he bade them 'good evening'. His deduction? 'They must have been foreign'." Old Mother (Joan) Burnie in The Daily Record on TV soap, Coronation Street's Jack and Vera Duckworth: "They represent not just everything which is best on the Street but about the institution of marriage itself. I am deadly serious". ------------------------------------------------------------------------ DUNDEE - Dun Deagh ================== Hello everybody! So where the hell is summer? Well, although there is no scientifically proven correlation, the disappearance of the sun seems to have coincided with the opening of the Pavement Cafe outside the Out/Brooklyn's Bar complex. This latest venture - not specifically gay but open to all - will surely prove popular if those clouds would bugger off. It has also had the repercussion of Brooklyn's Bar extending their opening hours from Noon Mon to Fri and 12-30 on Sun, both the Cafe and Bar are serving coffee. Along with all the usual offers and nights at Brooklyn's we can now add in the pool competition on Thu, from 8pm with a bottle of voddie up for grabs, and the Showbar's mix of music and musicals still going strong held in Brooklyn's on the last Sat of each month. Downstairs in Out are luring in the punters on Wed and Thu nights by offering spirits and shooters for a shiny pound coin (or note I guess, although not seen any of those for ages). Along the Seagate in Charlie's Bar everything should be back to normal in the next week or two as Charlie and Ian are back behind the bar and Ross returns to DJ'ing duties on Fri and Sat nights. The next quiz night will be on Tue 6th Sep, from 8pm with various prizes including £100 up for grabs. Diversitay continue to hold their monthly ice-breaker evenings in Braes on Perth Road. These are on the third Wed of each month from 8pm, next one being Sep 21st. There are also plans to hold a woman's disco downstairs in Braes in the future, more details will be published here nearer the time or by calling the Diversitay switchboard Mon evenings 7- 10pm on Dundee (01382) 202620. Chris E-mail: courier_chris@yahoo.co.uk ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Edinburgh Fringe Reviews ======================== ScotsGay at the Edinburgh fringe festival For the most comprehensive set of reviews during the Edinburgh Fringe see the Three Weeks daily sheets at main Fringe venues. Or for a different, entertaining take, with all the gossip, go to the best online Fringe review website www.fringereport.com. Fringe Report have a small army of reviewers this year, all under the careful direction of John Park - officially the nicest man on the planet. MARTIN "FLIPPER" WALKER'S FRINGE ScotsGay are using the Three Weeks star rating system: * A really bad show - don't go and see it ** A poor example of this show's genre *** A good example of this show's genre **** A very good example of this show's genre ***** A brilliant show - go and see it Appelby's Journey to the 21st Century **** Underbelly Caves This is a great premise for a stand up comedy show. Take great Science-Fiction TV staples, such as Space 1999 and Star Trek, and compare that vision of the 21st century to how it has all turned out. The result is a razor sharp political satire, in the style of 80s Ben Elton, or even better, Rob Newman or Mark Thomas. It's as funny as it is relentless. Sci-Fi promised a food pill that would solve world hunger. We ended up with GM crops whilst much of the world is still starving. If Appelby's strength is her intelligence, which she has in abundance, it's also her timing. She never misses a beat in this tight political set. Another reviewer commented that Appelby is far too opinionated... but is that really an insult? What's the point of being on the planet if you have no opinions? This very funny woman has won a stack of awards. Go see why. Aisle 16: Poetry Boyband ***** Pleasance Boyband member, Luke 16 has passed me a note, written especially for ScotsGay readers: "Hi gay fans! We just want to say we're well PYSCHED you guys like us so much. Our manager, Steve, says it's because we've been "marketed to cynically play on the weaknesses of a crude stereotype," but we know it's because you want to bum us. That's cool, we know that our gay fans are dead important because when the twelve year old girls grow up and loose interest you'll always be there. Y'know people often say to us that Poetry's gay but when we think of you guys we don't feel so bad about that. Yours pectorally, Aisle16 - The Poetry Boyband Luke Wright, Ross Sutherland, Joel Stickley and Chris Hicks are Aisle 16. They've been massive cult hits at the Edinburgh Fringe for years and with a huge fan following, forming a poetry boyband was the next logical step. They strut, they wear white suits, they leave us wondering if the cute one is gay. Kind of a cross between Take That and Tennyson? Perhaps not... They are taking the piss of course. Ultimately, Aisle 16 are simply four bloody good poets, who deliver an upbeat hilarious set of lectures and skits that reclaims poetry from the academics and the English teachers. If I have one very minor criticism - I'd have liked the boys to have loosened the Boyband image a little occasionally and allow themselves to be themselves. Luke performed solo at the Pleasance press launch and was one of the very best things there. He displays great confidence and stage presence that demands your attention. When he utters his self penned prose, to extend the pop metaphor, it's pure gold. I for one am hoping next years Edinburgh show will be entitled Aisle 16: Greatest Hits. Beautiful Thing **** Zoo So what if the actors playing the two main gay leads are straight? - this is still the best production of Beautiful Thing I have seen in years. Other attempts at Jonathan Harvey's script have relied on the beauty of its two teenage stars alone and have failed. This production is much more than that. At its heart, Beautiful Thing is a comedy that anyone can enjoy. Dead Rabbit Productions capture the spirit of the piece so well that I was sad when the performance ended. Joseph B Mahon as Jamie with Sam McIlroy as Ste were great, but special praise must go to the marvellous Lindsey Powell as the mixed-up drugged-up Leah who, like her character in the film, was a consummate scene-stealer. And, at the end of the day, if you can't enjoy this play for the great piece of theatre it is, enjoy it for the great Mama Cass soundtrack. Superb. Being Earnest, It's Quite Important *** 'C' central This pack of talented teenagers actually get away with rewriting Oscar Wilde's classic comedy of manners. They've held on to the important bits (the Bumberying and the Handbag), but slipped in a few postmodern scenes of their own. Maybe the producers decided to hang this show on Wilde to get the punters in - I don't know. I wanted to see more of them and less Wilde - and I am a fan of the great Irishman. This company are clearly very talented - they should learn the lessons of the past and not attempt to resurrect it. Wilde, if he where around today, would have gone for something new. Don't hold back people, take a risk. Between the Water and the Air **** 'C' electric This play revolves around the American practice of Ice Fishing. For those of you too lazy to figure this one out, it means fishing in ice. Academic overachiever Ken leaves the Ivory tower to become a mechanic, in the face of increased pressure from his family. There are three tremendous actors in this piece, who between them play the five characters in this touching and distinctive story. It's ironic as well as moving, and that's a difficult balance to achieve. The incidental music by Steve Whipple and Sarah Niblack is superb, atmospheric but never intrusive. This is an evocative production from a talented company. Caesar Twins and Friends *** Assembly Rooms The Caesar Twins are a gorgeous, acrobatic, talented pair of 25-year-old guys from Poland. What these guys can do with their bodies is quite exceptional. They can hold and twist themselves into such positions... it takes great strength, trust, and mental agility to perform this way. Eye candy agogo. Trouble is that this is a family event, and as such - they don't give us all they've got. Add to that some truly embarrassing, incomprehensible narrative (neither twins speak English very well) and we are left with is a much toned down performance of their late night show. Go see them at La Clique instead. Late, live and part of an adult cabaret experience that is one of the very hottest tickets on the Fringe. Christie and Doyle's Axis of Evil **** Underbelly A comedy entitled 'Axis of Evil' might have delivered an endless stream of satirical lefty critiques on the War on Terror or third world poverty - indeed, there are nods in this direction. "I always buy Nestle products - they kill babies, you see. They need the extra space for all their percolators." Racism and religion are also explored, but this show is at its best when depicting the 'evil' in the family arena. A recurring skit featuring a hideously dysfunctional heterosexual couple expecting their first child is frightening, frequently hilarious and all too real - the hate/love switch at the heart of their relationship is expertly depicted. This isn't simply hetero-bashing from the openly gay Doyle, it's a well-observed critique of the destructive nature of relationships in general. Unlike their less successful previews, which occasionally seemed a bit inaccessible, Christie and Doyle now involve the audience from the outset, meaning that everyone is relaxed enough to explore their darker sides. I've seen the show twice, and it's definitely developed along the right lines, which is surely what the fringe is all about. Sketches have been tweaked and prodded into shape. It was a potentially lame beast that has grown new legs. The end result is a must-see show from two of the country's best up-and-coming writer/comedians. Christine Jorgensen Reveals **** Assembly Rooms In the 1950s Christine Jorgensen was the most famous woman in the US because she used to be a man. After the Second World War, Jorgensen discharged himself from the army and travelled to Denmark to undergo a sexchange operation. To her great surprise, she was met by a media circus on her return as she stepped off the plane at New York's Idlewild Airport. It was said that she was the most written about person in the world, but amazingly only one recorded interview with her still exists. This sound recording has been digitally remastered and enhanced and is the basis of Christine Jorgensen Reveals. Bradford Louryk brings Jorgensen to life with elegant mannerisms, and some perfect lip-synching. Her interviewer, known only as Mr Russell, appears in the corner on a black and white TV set. Jorgensen was clearly a funny and intelligent woman, who was more than a match for Russell as she casually, almost whimsically, debunked myths surrounding gender and identity. The capacity audience was enthralled. Highly recommended. Colin and Fergus *** Pleasance Colin and Fergus are a traditional comedy double act and that is no bad thing. They occasionally like to kick about a bit of postmodern sketch deconstruction, but they work best when they are delivering gags. What is refreshing however is the way they play with the sexuality element in their act - adding to all the 'are they/aren't they' speculation about the pair. At one point they make a deliberately totally preposterous serenade to a women in the front row of the audience, apparently to prove that they are both straight - only to end up kissing each other. To sum up, Colin and Fergus are a cute pair of talented comics with more than a wee dose of homo-innuendo. Craig Hill's Got the Ballroom **** Assembly Rooms Year on year, Craig's show gets better and better and better, so it's only fitting that he should be given the Ballroom at the Ass Rooms this year. There is no one better at comic interaction with an audience than Craig - there is no gimmick or hook, the show is about Craig and the punters who flock to him in droves. There were a number of people who actually wanted to sit in the front row so Craig could pick on them. He also has a terrific singing voice, with some lovely, if unsubtle comic verse. My only minor quibble is that I wanted to hear more of it. Dark Horse, Indiana ** Pleasance Dark Horse, Indiana, was conceived as a satirical response to George W Bush's assault on civil liberties and on gay rights in particular. But in Dark Horse it is the heterosexuals who are labelled Sexually Immoral Degenerates of America by the homosexual majority. At its heart this piece is terrific idea, but it's almost totally ruined by its dreadfully over-preachy execution. There is very little actual drama here. Eric Barry's script lacks subtly or characterisation. The Orwellian elements occasionally do hit their target. The use of fear to control the majority and thus persecute a minority is well depicted. But what we are left with is a series of overlong monologues from shouting Americans. David Benson's Conspiracy Cabaret ***** Assembly Rooms David Benson has never, to my knowledge, fronted a bad show. His Edinburgh debut in 1996 on Kenneth Williams rightly earned him a Fringe First, and the standard has since never slipped. This year's show, Conspiracy Cabaret, explores Diana's death, the World Trade Centre attacks, Benson's homosexuality, the US neo cons, David Icke, God (the non existence of), lizard people and more. Benson tackles difficult subjects with immense charm and wit - there is always a friendly, if slightly mischievous glint in his eye. Expertly researched - this professionally produced show, with original and grand musical numbers that occasionally drop into a wonderfully intelligent, hilarious narrative - has everything. David Benson's best Fringe show yet - and that's saying something. Dogg's Hamlet, Cahoot MacBeth* Rocket "Brick!" yells an actor. "Cube!" answers another. "Haddock", and then "Priest" followed by a lot of "Slab". This isn't English, this is Tom Stoppard's language of Dogg. The script seeks to explore the possibilities of wordplay and the way that language can both limit and free us. Sadly this production conveys none of that. In a script as complicated as this, we really need professionals - or at least some far tighter direction. To be fair, there are some lively performances from the young cast, some of whom show great potential, but this is ruined when the policeman - easily the most irritating character I have seen on any stage this festival, blusters on and on and on.... And when the Shakespeare element commenced it got even worse. Dog's breakfast is too easy to write - but that is what this sorry excuse for a production is. I actually left the theatre feeling angry. Forbidden *** Holyrood Tavern Close to the bone and not afraid, as your mum might put it, of using bad language, Forbidden takes us on a journey with a devil. Tom Papitto is an actor/writer from Southern California, who uses his phenomenal stage presence to lecture us on a race, religion, sex and politics. "Both vital and taboo," he says, "controversy reaffirms life." Tom's website states, "The modern perimeter of theatre is trite and obvious. We know the endings of the classics. What's the solution? Silly concepts that feel they're being innovative? What's left? Your belief system is your prison. That which you're afraid of should be unleashed. Let us be scared by theatre, and compelled to think. Somewhere between religions/ideologies and political correctness lies the truth. Or at least let us explore the conflicts. See the show you need to see." I'm not going to argue with him. Hedwig and the Angry Inch ***** Greenside The premise is just tremendous. A young man escapes from East Germany during the Cold War by undergoing a sexchange operation and marrying an American called Luther. Just one snag - the penectomy is botched, leaving poor Hedwig with only "an angry inch" to play with. This is a punk revision of John Cameron Mitchell's classic, a concert with a strangely poignant narrative, based largely on Plato's philosophy of the origin of love from his "Symposium". The band members have an infectious energy, with standout performances from the brilliant Lydia Wilson as Yitzhak (Hedwig in certain shows), and the somewhat arousing James Traer VI on the bass. Joe Swarbrick transfixes the audience as the title role, with his bittersweet rantings and phenomenal singing voice. He adds witty asides and audience interaction to Mitchell's original script, and has interpreted Hedwig as at once confrontational and vulnerable, one moment weeping into his microphone, the next spitting water onto the front row in an affectionate gesture to the traditions of heavy metal. Just one word of warning - don't leave your mobile phone switched on. Holly's Hot Spot ***** C Chambers St Holly is a classic jazz singer with a twist, reminiscent perhaps of Liza Minnelli in Cabaret, but with a style which is all her own. And a wonderful voice. You'll close your eyes during one of her ballads and drift away to a wonderful place. More upbeat numbers had the whole audience foot-tapping and cheering. But if she excels as a 'straight' jazz singer, and she does, her quirky, cheeky banter really hits the hot spot. She can master an audience like a great stand up comedian. Her unscripted(?) asides convey a real feeling of sensual, vulnerable danger. Her upbeat play is as much fun as you can expect to see at any festival show. Go see her now - then buy the CD. Holly is going to be huge! Kiki and Herb **** Pleasance Much of the wild and spontaneous whooping and applause during this performance came from Kiki and Herb's fellow New Yorkers in the audience - because they got all the jokes. North American cultural references abound, and when large sections of an audience start feeling like they're missing out, a show could be in trouble. Thankfully, Kiki and Herb make up for this with a brilliant show with some truly terrific narrative, Kiki really is some bitch, whilst Herb thrashes away at the piano, continuously for the whole hour, trying to keep up with, and occasionally getting ahead of, her latest aural lampoon. There is so much here that's a real delight. Stories of how they met as preteens in a state institution with Herb getting bullied by homophobes and Kiki's fag-haggy protection/ obsession with him hit the mark. Kiki's utter hatred for George W and the neocons is stunningly harsh and totally appropriate. Most of the musical numbers features bitchy remakes of familiar songs. It's all there, and more, with volume. La Clique ***** Spiegel Garden This is quite, quite brilliant! An exhilarating, fast-paced, sledgehammer of a show. The Caesar Twins, now stripped to the waist (the way we like them), contort their bodies into shapes that would make MC Escher cringe with envy. There are roller-bladers who throw each other around like rag-dolls, a trapeze artist with the malleability of a pipe-cleaner but the strength of Vin Diesel, a semi- Spanish semi-cockney singer who slips from one dialect to the other almost imperceptibly. Oh, and there's a woman who pulls her handkerchief out of her own vagina. Fun for all the family. Lost and Lonely Rebels *** Underbelly Three talented funny young men - Humphrey Ker, Stuart Murphy and the critically acclaimed Miles Jupp - perform in a brand new sketch show, blending sure-fire gags with no-nonsense observational humour. Make no mistake, this is not the Miles Jupp show with guests; Ker and Murphy are easily his equal in terms of their performance skills. As a team, they work exceptionally well together, producing a slick and original hour of comedy. My main gripe is that the conceit of dancing through the set changes becomes monotonous, and what might have been an off-beat and creative interlude is ruined through repetition. Nevertheless, the show is worth checking out, and it's a fine testament to The Stand comedy club, who have supported these lost and lonely rebels. Night of a Thousand Jay Ashtons **** C Chambers St The best show about Bucks Fizz on the fringe. The camp soundtrack forms the backbone to this show, enabling the bejewelled and bearded group to romp about the stage with grace and vigour. Hilarious and high-energy radical drag - the kind show your mother warned you about. Go see. The Pitchfork Disney **** Rocket About Turn are a company who deserve a longer run with Pitchfork Disney. The standard of acting in particular is very well maintained throughout. The show begins with two young people who seem to sustain themselves on a diet of chocolate, pills and dreams. They have been alone since their parents disappeared years ago. They permit two very odd strangers to invade their domain. This is a very verbal show, and the extended dream descriptions mean that it would work well on radio - listen to this in a darkened room and then try to go to sleep! One of the dreams involves the male dreamer being masturbated by a shopboy who is then violently murdered by the "monster" - a clear case of the dreamer destroying a part of himself that he cannot accept. The ending seems a little too upbeat - it could have been far nastier, but it is a compelling piece emerging from a strong and muscular imagination. Rap Canterbury Tales **** 'C' Chambers Street Return of the cult fringe hit of 2004. The notion of the so-called "father of English literature" being transformed into a oneman rap show might cause many purists to baulk and choke on their lobster thermadore, but there's something so appropriate about this marriage of hip-hop and middle-English poetry. Bearing in mind that Chaucer's poetry was intended to be read aloud, and has a distinctive rhythmic quality, the concept underlying this show is not so farfetched. Baba Brinkman, an accomplished rapper in his own right, performs his versions of three of the Canterbury Tales; those of the Miller, the Pardoner, and the Wife of Bath. He brings a different style of rap to each, much like Chaucer's use of alternative voices for each story. This is a well-informed and intelligent piece of work, which appeals to a wide audience. Be you an Oxbridge don in a dodgy Crimplene suit, or a Kappa-clad teenager in a souped-up Nova, this one's for you. Romeo and Juliet ** The Rocket In my six years of reviewing the Fringe and plays for ScotsGay, I have never walked out during a performance. I've seen some utter tripe in my time, but to leave early is rude and unfair. How does one review a show if one doesn't stay till the end? The best you can hope for is that whoever is on stage realises that they are wasting everybody's time and simply stops. So apologies to those involved in About Turn's version of Romeo and Juliet, but the play did start late and I had another show to go on to. I saw the production up to the point when the Priest comes up with a plot to get Juliet and Romeo back together again after Romeo's exiled for the killing of Tybalt. From what I saw, this version of Shakespeare's play wasn't awful, but there were too many missing characters and clumsily chainsawed lines. It's absolutely fine to mess around with a classic but you must treat it with more respect than this. The English teacher sitting next to me shook his head and groaned all the way through until his own early exit. Sister Myotis: Southern-Fried and Sanctified *** 'C' Chambers Street Right wing US Southern Christians are an easy target, but that doesn't mean that poking them with a stick isn't a lot of fun. The audience finds themselves in a meeting of the "honey-bees", a femaleonly group of happy-clappy, rootin'- tootin', Bible-bashin' Christian gals. There's a lot of fun to be had in implicating the audience so directly in the show, and writer/performer Steve Swift is remarkable as the larger-than-life Sister Myotis. His script is peppered with oneliners, and cleverly intimates the dangers of fundamentalist Christianity without losing his sense of joviality. The trouble is that the show runs out of steam after about twenty minutes. The seeds are there for a terrific night's entertainment, but the show doesn't quite do justice to the ideas. It's a jolly ol' journey without a destination. Some Explicit Polaroids **** Underbelly Caves If you liked "Shopping and Fucking", you'll probably love this. The usual Ravenhill themes are all present and correct - abuse, loneliness, revenge, desperation, isolation. But fret not, you won't emerge from the auditorium looking for the nearest precipice from which to throw yourself. There's a lightness of touch that produces some incongruously funny moments. Characters from a variety of dysfunctional backgrounds are thrown together - a French rent boy, an ambitious New Labour councillor, a Marxist ex-con - and a series of confrontational set-pieces ensue. The performances are uniformly excellent, and the direction is tighter than a Jean-Paul Gaultier sailor vest. The death of scenequeen Tim provides a point of focus for the disparate personalities, and we catch a temporary glimmer of hope. Like Ravenhill's West End hit "Mother Clap's Molly House", the final image is that of the characters dancing together in a night club. As anyone who has been to CC Blooms will tell you, there is a sadness at the heart of disco (as well as the occasional sweaty armpit in the face), but in Ravenhill's vision this becomes explicit. Growling Monkey's production is brash, powerful, and shockingly relevant. Plus all the money they raise will go to an AIDS charity, so even if it's not your cup of chai there are worse ways to spend your money. Sue Perkins **** Pleasance This show is an out-and-out success, with the emphasis being on the word "out". For the first time in her career, Sue is more openly introspective (if that's not an oxymoron) about her sexual orientation. It's a refreshing venture, and one that does justice to her talents. She has a comedic instinct that would engage a wide-range of punters, and her quips are unfailingly intelligent and incisive. More to the point, this show is laugh-out-loud funny. There is an absurdist quality to her turn of phrase, but it is when she focuses on the anecdotal that she really hits the spot. It's an edgier show than you'd expect from someone who has starred in a Kingsmill advert, but still lacking the kind of bite you'd see from the likes of Stewart Lee. Expect all the goodness of a fine loaf with the crusts trimmed off. A Swell Party *** Augustine's A musical biography of Cole Porter incorporating over twenty of his classic songs can't really go wrong. His music is genre-defining, and his lyrical prowess rivals the wit of Noel Coward or Neil Tennant. Chris MacDonnell is astounding in the lead role, and if ever in need of a few bob could be employed as a lookielikie for Robert de Niro. He doesn't try to impersonate Porter, and is all the better for it. He has a resounding individual voice, and an admirable sensitivity to the nuances of the lyrics. Despite a few uneven performances, the cast are generally strong. Philip Giorgi and Wendy Killian are perfect in their varying roles, and support their lead with generosity and class. Worth a look, especially if you're a Porter aficionado. Topping and Butch ***** Pleasance Last year they stormed Edinburgh with the best show on the Fringe. But in 2005 their show is even better! As usual, their opener is the song "Never Mind", the lyrics of which change day-by-day in accordance with the world's events. We are treated to satirical reflections on the London suicide bombings, the Royal Wedding, and that renowned raconteur George W Bush. Topping & Butch are well ahead of their game, largely because they understand the true nature of satire. It's insufficient to simply mention the London bombings for shock value without having something to say. And to convey their caustic perceptions through the medium of whimsical tunes is even better. Despite their trademark lipstick-red S&M rubberwear, this pair has a camp charm that is accessible to all. They chat amongst themselves and involve the audience in a warm and unthreatening manner. But if you're after something more extreme, check out their late night show "Filth!" at the Underbelly. Witty, acerbic, and above all bloody funny. And there is so much more, how about... Stewart Lee at the Underbelly, Out on the Fringe at Augustine's, Wilde by Name at Diverse Attractions, The Laramie Project at the Church Hill Theatre and at the Zoo, Bruce Devlin at the Stand, Out of the Corset at Greenside, Six Degrees of Separation at Roman Eagle Lodge, Lipstick Sherlock Holmes at Greyfriars Kirk house, Kit and the Widow at the Royal Academy and Corpus Christi (and countless other shows) at the wonderful 'C' venues. Have a terrific festival, and do say hello if you see me loitering around a bar in need of some company. Thanks to Phil, Stephen and Jess. TONY CHALLIS'S FRINGE Birth of the Cool ***** Gilded Balloon A very different celebration of a way of life came with Birth of Cool. This takes us back to the 50s, to the beginning of rebellious counter-culture, and to the Beats. To Paul Cutlan's evocative music, with references to Charlie Parker and Dizzy Gillespie, a past world is conjured up. This is the world of Jack Kerouac's "On the Road", of Burroughs, Ferlinghetti, and starting with some of Allen Ginsberg's "Howl". John Turnbull gives a stunning performance as the voice of the Beats, reciting from the works, singing, and telling the life-stories, warts and all. It's difficult to comprehend now how bravely this group stood against the mainstream, and the courage of someone like Ginsberg being openly and publicly gay at the time of McCarthyism. Cutlan, Fabian Hevia and Steve Arie provide an intensely evocative musical environment. Remember - power and pleasure lie in kissing ass -and get your ass on down to the Gilded Balloon while tickets are still available. Desperately Seeking Sorrow * Holyrood Tavern Danny Worthington and Johnny Sorrow presented this two-man show to a very select audience, and we two reviewers felt quite privileged. Some of the jokes were quite cringeworthy, and Danny especially had to pause to collect his thoughts at several points. Johnny had a much smoother patter, but he needed someone to rewrite his script. Danny's talk about coming out as gay was rather sympathetic, but I really couldn't recommend this as a good use of anyone's time. Faultless and Torrance Take their Face/Off ** Gilded Balloon The two members of the Jakki Moore company have jumped on the bandwagon of bombs and fear, and add to this a change of identity between them. The bomb goes missing and we are perhaps meant to feel a frisson concerning it's whereabouts. The change of identity involves some scuffling behind a screen. Heigh ho. There were people in the audience who were in stitches, but I did not find it nearly as engaging as their show of last year. I could barely raise a titter. Immaculate **** Gilded Balloon Oliver Lansley's Immaculate imagines a modern lass who discovers herself to be six months pregnant a year after she last had sex. In comes a guy who looks very like William Golding - But, he is no Lord of the Flies, indeed, he is an Angel Gabriel who clearly has no control over God's flies! Being a modern lass, on being told that her foetus is "one of ours - a divine " there is no enraptured acceptance, but rather an angry reaction to her body being used without her permission. Her "ex", an old flame, her female friend who hates babies and an extremely camp Lucifer who lays claim to the child all add to the stew. This is a most entertaining and thought-provoking comedy, full of great lines and where the timing is excellent. Highly recommended. Minor Irritations **** Pleasance Sam Peter Jackson's play is an extremely entertaining comedy about Ben, an aspiring actor doing various fill-in jobs, his friends in London, and his decision to visit his ex in New York, where new possibilities emerge. There are many excellent comic moments. Ben is very good at avoiding opportunities that are thrown at him like gauntlets. One of the best things is the unforced and extremely natural behaviour of the cast regarding gay life, (unlike some Fringe Shows I could mention - "Dark Horse Indiana" comes to mind, which seemed to be all careful posing and rhetoric.) Nick White and Charlie Tighe move between various parts very effectively, and Dulcie Lewis displays great comic presence and character. Sam Peter Jackson's first play is a delight, and I await his next with eager anticipation. Pam Ann: Flying High * Pleasance Courtyard Big crowd, everyone laughing. But I couldn't raise a titter. Maybe it's because I cannot stand the kind of TV shows where people make complete arses of themselves just so that they can be on the screen. And there are plenty of shows I have laughed my head off at this past week or so. I just found the opening jokes about air crashes too obvious. Then when we were divided into business, economy etc I thought this was just emphasising the obvious fact that money talks when you travel. But, the audience were so keen on it! - even when a guy from the front was taken through the " spiral staircase" and to the empty back rows of "economy minus". If I thought I detected a sneer in Pam Ann's tone, this was surely justified. She could sit back and have gaps when nothing was really happening in the knowledge that the audience would sit with glazed smiles for as long as it took, basking simply in her presence. They had come out to be mildly abused by a "celebrity", and they were determined to enjoy the experience. Even if the jokes were few and obvious. Even if two little girls in the front row were told they were going to be taken and sold into slavery. Even if we were asked to laugh at the noise we heard when a microphone was placed over fizzing champagne. Sorry. Not for me. TONY CHALLIS AT THE BOOK FESTIVAL The Book Festival opened on Saturday 13 August with a reading by the famous poet, Carol Ann Duffy. This included some engrossing flights of fancy, of which my favourite was "The Diet," in which a dieter is reduced to the size of a thimble, and she ends up inside the gut of a fat woman (Better as poem!) There was also the well known from Mrs Tiresias in which the protagonist, having been changed into a woman, demands 12 weeks a year paid menstrual leave. And there was a poem about alternative love. Carol Ann Duffy promised to get "steamy" in her afternoon reading, but this was first thing in the morning. That evening saw Michael Cunningham speak and read from his new novel, "Specimen Days". His earlier novels, "A Home at the End of the World" and "The Hours" are well known and have been filmed. "Specimen Days" consists of three linked stories, one set in mid-19th century New York, one in the (post-9/11) present and one in a far future. All contain characters who are greatly influenced by and tend to quote from the homoerotic poet Walt Whitman. This is a very unusual and richly written novel. When questioned about the sexuality of his characters, Michael Cunningham said that the available labels - gay, straight, bi, transgender, etc were inadequate boxes and labels. He said that he sought to find the idiosyncrasy of his characters, and that his own situation as a gay man in a relationship was only one of a mass of possibilities. Later Dermot Bolger read from his new novel, The Family on Paradise Pier, a complex story of members of a family who are involved in many of the crucial events of the first half of the 20th century. One of his earlier novels, "The Valparaiso Voyage" is highly regarded, and includes affecting scenes of the relationship between a young gay man and his estranged father. Bolger is one of the most interesting of contemporary Irish writers. The following are of special interest: Edmund White. Fri 26th Aug 11.30 - An autobiographical hour with a famous and charming gay author. Val McDermid. Fri 26th Aug. 18.30 - A famous Scottish writer of thrillers. David Starkey. Fri 26th Aug 20.00 - The historian made famous by television. Hey, why not make a day of it?! LAURA MCGRATH'S FRINGE Jason Byrne Assembly Rooms Always a festival favourite Jason Byrne didn't disappoint at this year's festival. He bounced onto the stage behind a dancer and began his wonderful mix of improvisation and gags like the professional he is. A regular at the Fringe he returns this year with The Lovely Goat show complete with professional dancers who only add to the excellent entertainment on offer. He has jokes about everything from his kid to people in the audience and anyone who gets up to leave for the toilet is quickly made fun of and becomes part of the show. Tonight he picked on a sixteen year old to pull onto his stage and made jokes about being young and excitable around someone you fancy. It is due to his great improvisational skills that you're bound to see a slightly different show every night. He sells out the big theatre at The Assembly Rooms fast so book early, it's a show not to be missed. NUN THE WISER'S FRINGE Dirty Fan Male, Gilded Ballon, 18:45 The premise of this show is remarkably simple: you end up collecting the fan mail sent to your sisters pornstar fanclub, as well as the letters sent to the other dozen odd fanclubs she runs for other Daily Sport girls, how do you present this material when your first venture of a CD doesn't take off? You do a Fringe show with an actor with an incredible vocal range. This is possibly the only show that can come back after a full year at last years Fringe with completely new material due to the amount of letters some of the 'serial' correspondents wrote. The one thing that seems to keep re-appearing though is the lonely heterosexual fantasy of watching Page 3 girls defecate. Robert Newman: Apocalypso Now, Bongo Club World War One was started by the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand on June 28, 1914 in Sarajevo. Wrong. Rob explains how Iraq's oil was the real reason. May include Wordsworth, spies, and the shattering of everything you learnt in History. Oh, and if you're really lucky the most accurate impersonation of Johnny Rotten ever seen on a live stage. MARTIN POWELL'S FRINGE Pip Utton, Bacon, Pleasance Courtyard ***** Pip Utton does it again. My main problem with this show was that I know so little of the life of Francis Bacon that I was unable to judge the extent to which this was a recreation of his life and to what extent conjecture, but let's ignore that. This is a masterpiece. Bravely set in the present time, after Bacon's death in 1992, it tells of his life from his birth in Dublin. It focuses early on with his sex life and the men with whom he fucked. It moves on to tell his life story and of his painting. Much is made of the representation of an image on canvas and the equivalent photographic image, which Utton brilliantly illustrates by coming out of and going back into character. We learn of a sad old queen who thinks his life has been a disaster. A sad tale about a great painter. Oh, and I'm told, but have not yet seen, that the exhibition of Bacon's paintings currently on in Edinburgh is excellent. Peter Reder, Guided Tour, Traverse 5 (McEwan Hall) *** The title suggested we were going to get a tour of the underground passages of a prominent but little known building. It turned out to be far more than this. It resonated with me because of a local history project I am involved in. Why was it built? Why did an uneducated beer tycoon finance it? What was there before? Why do we regard the written record as more trustworthy than the oral history? We move on to the history of Reder's family and what is truth and fiction. We end up with a 10 minute film that added nothing for me. One audience member was heard to say on leaving "I'm sure it would have been more interesting if we had all got together and talked about the building". It would certainly have been different. Breath[e], Traverse 7 ** Well when you go to see "a play without words or actors" you expect something different. We got it. 35 minutes of a smoke machine, sounds, and lighting design. I think what they were trying to convey was how we assemble the data that hit our senses and try to form a coherent picture out of what we encounter. However it told me no story. At the end there was a stunned silence. Not a good sign. The Riot Group, Switch Triptych, Assembly Rooms **** This is probably the only publication reviewing the Fringe whose Editor used to have a fully functioning Strowger telephone exchange standing in his hall, so this story about the mechanisation of phones had an extra interest for me. I remember The Riot Group playing in The Garage's second space, which held about 20. This was staged in the Assembly's Ballroom, one of the largest Fringe venues. However that wasn't the only thing about this show that was larger, from the set to the breadth of issues covered it was bigger. Like all Riot Group shows the words are delivered at a fierce rate of knots and there is so much delivered that I expect many will see the play in different ways. One problem was that some of it is delivered over headsets with the actors facing away from the audience and the PA system was not up to it. The action supposedly takes place in a 1919 New York manual phone exchange on the eve of automation but it could just as easily be set in the 1990s as lots of jobs were replaced by call centres or in 2005 when call centres are outsourced to India. Initially I couldn't see where it was going but I think we were just meant to get to dislike the characters. About halfway through it came alive as we begin to understand them as fallible human beings. We all have our down sides but we are all people and if we forget that we all lose. It goes on to discuss the nature of progress and the treatment of capitalism as a religion. Over 30 years ago Ted Heath condemned a company as "an unpleasant and unacceptable face of capitalism", I doubt any politician would dare to utter such words today about a lawful yet wrong behaviour. It is to the author Adriano Shaplin's credit that as ever he is prepared to challenge orthodoxy. However he also covers the individual as opposed to the organisation, how we relate to each other, and a bit of sexual and industrial politics as well. And this is my main problem with it, I think he tries to cover too much. However this is a major play that is well worth seeing. Some shows you see and forget, some you sort of say "yes", and some you see you just can't forget and keep going back to and thinking about them. This is definitely in the last category. Initially I thought my star rating might have been too generous. I now think I may have been too mean. The Editor adds: This play has caused some comment on the Strowger Yahoogroup - "Someone didn't do their research. Bell Atlantic was NOT the telephone company in NY City at the time of automation, BA existed after the breakup of the Bell System, which was several DECADES after the time period of this story. Also the headset worn by the actress is the ubiquitous Type 52, also a product of a later decade than 1919." Traverse Theatre Company, East Coast Chicken Supper, Traverse 1 *** In this new play by Martin J Taylor Gibb (Garry Collins) has just returned to a small Fife town having disappeared without notice for a year. His friends Fred (Paul Rattray) and Stew (Paul Blair) have carried on with their business as drug dealers. We follow them through a period of less than 24 hours and see what emerges. A witty play with plenty of action it is OK but really doesn't go anywhere and at the conclusion more or less stops rather than ends. An enjoyable play with the standard of acting you expect from The Traverse but it held no wow factor for me. Volcano Theatre Company, My Pyramids, or How I got Fired from the Dairy Queen, and Ended Up in Abu Ghraib by Private Lynndie England, Traverse 1 **** No not the Volcano from Swansea this lot are from Toronto. For those who have forgotten Lynndie England was the one pictured in the camp with the thumbs up and a naked man on a dog leash. In this new play by Judith Thompson we follow her fictionalised attitudes from that time to her trial. I was reminded of George Orwell's description of Neville Chamberlain "A man doing his best through his own rather dim lights". It tells of a woman with 65,000 Google hits who is ridiculed but thinks of herself as a hero who in time will be welcomed back by the USA. It points at a mindset that sees others as sub-human terrorists and therefore without rights. Unlike the master race looking after them, and we all know where that leads. A chilling vision of where things could lead and a superb solo performance by Waneta Storms. Macbeth The Hour, Cambridge University ADC, C Chambers St ** Well the last Macbeth I saw was by Northern Broadsides so this company had a lot to live up to. Did they come close? No, but then I hardly expected them to. A radical reworking of the Scottish play lasting exactly 60 minutes. I had no problems with the weird sisters being portrayed as orgasmic lesbians. I did have a problem with part of the dialogue being delivered more like a horse racing commentary in order to fit it all in - a dramatic pause is just that. I do wonder whether anyone unfamiliar with the play would have understood it. As to the acting, other than Lady Macbeth (?) I'd advise the rest of the cast to look for a day job after graduating. The question mark above is because I've no idea who played the part and nor does the company's press release tell me. In fact if I'd read the press release before seeing the show I wouldn't have touched it with a barge pole. So the company also need to work on the publicity front. Trestle Theatre Company, Beyond Midnight, Pleasance Courtyard ** Cinderella is dead, her husband must remarry, who does the slipper now fit? No other than their daughter Princess Amanda. A dark tale about incest? No, the princess runs away and takes menial jobs until she finds a prince who will have her, and it appears only a prince will do. Is that it? Basically yes. Quite frankly if Trestle had brought their acting talents to a straight production of Cinderella it would have been more interesting. We got the half and full masks, the puppets, and the music we expect from Trestle all delivered expertly, but very little else. Tabula Rasa Theatre, The Importance of being Turbann'd, C Chambers St **** Forget Oscar Wilde, more Brian Rix. I'm not sure why the Sikh grandfather was in a kilt but C Venues have a thing about kilts. This is a witty farce about an arranged marriage. Like the best April fool stories it leads you step by step from one improbable event to the next, each one perfectly plausible at the time but on reflection the whole is totally unbelievable. This shows the quality of the writing. I thought this a typically British show so was amazed to find the author Jaspreet Singh Boparai is a Canadian Punjabi Catholic. An excellent evening's entertainment. Do Theatre, Sleep...less...ness, Aurora Nova **** There are some shows that are just a joy to watch and this was one of them. The sheer professionalism and the way it was constructed was brilliant. Which given I don't have any idea what it was about is quite a statement. There is the title, but other than a bed on stage and the occasional use of pillows there was little to relate it to the title, but who cares? Five superb dancers perform this piece choreographed by Evgeny Kozlov that ranged from Irish music through women as pieces of meat, and all of us on public transport as pieces of meat, to a stage full of oranges, and onto chamber pots. Yes it sounds bizarre but works, as does the pillows as penises for the masturbation scene. I normally hate dance with no music. This featured a long scene with a bed and no music. It wasn't until the music resumed that I realised it had gone away. Fucking brilliant. Bob Kingdom, Laurel & Laurel, Assembly Rooms *** Bob Kingdom looked the part and for the most part sounded it, although occasionally the lilt of the Welsh valleys seemed more prominent than one would expect from someone who originated from Ulverston. It sort of told his life story but there seemed too little about his life and his relationship with his partner Oliver Hardy. Like many comedians he appears to have been a sad man. He was married 8 times to 4 women and sailed to America on the same ship as Charlie Chaplin. But what was he really like? I suspect we will never know. New Writing North, We Love You Arthur, Assembly Rooms ***** OK, I went to see it because it seemed so bizarre. Two teenage girls in love with Arthur Scargill, but this was more media hype than substance. True, it starts with two 14-15 year olds at the time of the miners' strike with a crush on Arthur Scargill. It re-evoked those times. I had almost forgotten about the "Coal not Dole" stickers. However what develops is a serious yet very witty insight into a Durham miner's family at the time of the strike. A superb piece of theatre that doesn't take itself too seriously, yet manages to encompass the strike, the breakdown of communities, life, death, and the ups and downs we all face. Make no mistake Fiona Evans is a new writer to look out for. I look forward to seeing more of her work. Oh, and the joke about the dogs shagging is brilliant - and I won't give it away. Go see. Brian Longwell, Why Work?, Smirnoff Baby Belly ** Forget slick Powerpoint presentations. Brian Longwell is a management guru still living in the age of overhead projector presentations. And naff ones at that, and that is the main joke. The first time I saw Longwell it worked really well. This time I was less sure. That the show had to be concluded with a couple of sketches including other actors made me think he really didn't have enough material. I think the idea has merit, a satire on slick presentations, and could work well in the future but this one didn't do it for me. New String Theatre Company, The Wrong Man, Pleasance Dome ***** It's not every day even at the Edinburgh Fringe that one gets a play written by a former IRA activist, Danny Morrison, but boy can he write. It starts off with a Catholic being kidnapped in Belfast. Is he the wrong man? I thought that was going to be the gist of the play, but no, perhaps I was the wrong man. What develops in this superb play is a powerful story about power, truth and lies, and what it is legitimate to do to extract information. Not just by organisations but in human relationships. How honest we are, who can we trust and whose fault is it when things go wrong. Quite a lot to cover in 70 minutes but mastered effortlessly by this superb company. One of the most powerful and thought provoking shows you are likely to see on the Fringe. I look forward to seeing Danny Morrison's next play. Writers of this quality do not come along very often. Peepolykus, All in the Timing, Assembly Rooms *** One is never quite sure what to expect from this lot, or indeed who they will be. This latter issue seems to have gone away and we are this year yet again presented with David Sant, Javier Marzan, and John Nicholson. This year we got a sketch show in six parts. Part 1 consisted of 3 chimps with typewriters trying to write Hamlet and complaining they didn't have laptops. Part 2 was great, a conversation in real life where you've said the wrong thing but can take a second take. I initially thought part 4 where Trotsky appears on stage with an ice pick in his head showed a lack of research only to find that was part of the joke. A witty light hearted show in the afternoon. Bring on next year's show. I'll be there. Jo Stromgren Kompani, The Hospital, Aurora Nova **** I have never before had a problem in categorising something as dance or physical theatre. I've no idea how to class this. There are sections that can only be thought of as dance and others that are in no way dance yet the piece flows beautifully between the two. You can tell how good it is by the fact that most of the dialogue provided by this Norwegian company is not in English but it doesn't matter. We are in a hospital with three nurses and no patients. A helicopter passes overhead, I assume we are in a war zone and they are waiting for casualties. A witty and manic tale unfolds. They may not need patients with each other, particularly after they open the drug cabinet and start sampling its contents. Different and superb. Kandinsky, Enola, Smirnoff Baby Belly ***** I thought this started weakly and anachronistically with a current US flag and a chilling speech from 1945 about legitimate targets in Japan, but this may have been deliberate to suggest that current events are just as chilling. Given certain other parts showed similar howlers I make no judgment. Enola Gay was the name given to the plane that dropped the atom bomb on Hiroshima. It was named after the pilot's mother and was a name that was given to three generations of the family. This is a story of a bombing, a family, those who developed the bomb and their morality, and a community. It also takes a swipe at the Roman Catholic church and their apparent condemnation of the woman Enola Gay (who killed herself), and contrasts that with their relative silence about nuclear weapons. It is also a story of a Kansas town, a company town that built the B29 that dropped the bomb. OK some of the physics was decidedly shaky, as may have been some of the theology for all I know, but a great story well told by great actors in a dreadful venue where it was almost impossible to see much from where I was sitting. But it didn't matter. Well done. Rainpan 43, All Wear Bowlers, Aurora Nova ***** A lovely original and thoroughly witty show. If you think of the zany comedy of a Pig Iron show and the danger of rather more involvement from the audience than they wanted from an early Told by an Idiot show you sort of get the picture. Geoff Sobelle (who has worked with Pig Iron), and Trey Lyford have created a wonder. It starts with two men in bowlers appearing, with a nod in the direction of Laurel and Hardy, in a silent movie. Almost immediately our perceptions of the nature of cinema and live theatre are challenged as the actors leap off the edge of the screen and into the performance space. A series of great sketches that formed a wonderful mixture of clowning, mime, and conjuring tricks. Eggs seemed to feature prominently and there was a marvellous ventriloquist act - you'll believe a man is wooden. But then the "dummy" comes alive, threatens the audience, and morphs into King Kong. Truly great theatre. Ashley Page Rosie Kay Dance Company and The Curve Foundation, Dance Base *** A series of short pieces. CervaNtes was a solo piece danced by Christophe Carpentier and choreographed by Ana Lujan Sanchez. Danced with no music it was competent but uninspiring. This was followed by Savalliana. Another solo piece but one where the music added to the dance. We moved on to Refurbished Behaviour choreographed by Ashley Page of Scottish Ballet. Now we were really getting somewhere. Two excellent dancers, Diana Loosmore and Jarkko Lehmus, moving together with a balanced movement and an imaginative use of a chair. This was followed by Asylum by the Rosie Kay Dance Company. A dark piece about belonging and separation. Then it was back to another excellent piece Acrid Avid Jam again by Scottish Ballet. Colin Poole, Double Bill, Dance Base **** Two very different pieces. The Box Office was about urban living on a run down estate and was a solo piece ably danced by Poole. Bad Faith was about two people and their relationship. For a long time they never touch and seem to pay more attention on looking at the audience than each other which contrasts nicely with the clearly sexual nature of most of the dance. However this changes and gets about as explicit as it can for two people who keep their clothes on, in a hilarious parody of sex. Grid Iron, The Devil's Larder, Traverse 4 (Debenhams) ***** Can Grid Iron do a crap show? If so, this wasn't it. Wonderful as ever. A play based on the novel by Jim Crace about food and how we relate to it. The way the food industry provides work for the new migrant, hotel food, poisonous food, our tendency to store food we will never use, the essence of the dinner party, producing ones own food, food and sex, and much much more.As usual for Grid Iron a promenade. In this case through Debenhams. As you might expect, the acting is superb, the music sublime, and the design cannot be faulted. I've been thinking rather a lot about food recently as my fridge-freezer has stopped working so this work really struck a chord with me, and I can hardly blame Grid Iron for the state of my electrical appliances. State of the Art Productions, Beautiful Child, C Central *** A strange play by Nicky Silver where all of the characters have problems. Delia (Charlotte Brookes) is in love with Harry (Richard Weinman), who is married to Nan (Emily Murphy) who has never loved him. They have a son Isaac (Alex Eisenberg) who is an art teacher with a liking for 8 year old boys. There is also a psychologist (Julia Stidolph) who seems to need one. The parents decide they need to take some drastic action to do something about their son, which given that the mother has known about his desires for 3 years seemed utterly implausible. However it has its moments and the acting is quite good. FRINGE BUNNY In the true name of Fringe Bunny-ism I'm burrowing for gossip by writing this in a live show! Mark Watson is currently breaking records and boundaries doing 2005 minutes of stand up: a year a minute from Christ to now. Just to set your scene, I'm sitting just on stage tapping away with sound proof headphones on. Mark and I have the same deadline, Midnight, so it's encouraging to be here! Where better to bring up-tothe- minute fringe news from, than on stage? Anyway, enough about me. Now, I'm not one to gossip but Alan Carr and Brendon Burns are living together and sharing a little unhealthy competition. Referring to each other as Poofy and Shouty they are competing for Gay Points in the house. For instance baking will score a hundred points with 50 points added for every home made ingredient. Shagging a man will of course score 1000 points; however before you place your bets, the surprising current total sees Burns romping away with the lead. Having been baking like a demon he has secured extra Gay Points by snogging a boy in the kitchen "I just did it to shut him up, he was talking too much." Yes Brendon, we believe you. Carr says "I'm not doing well, I think I'll be on minus points by the end of the festival." So if you see him he needs help. With his baking that is. Burns has been getting up to his usual antics during Mark's 2005 Minutes show, so far he's challenged all the comedians in the room to a Trivial Pursuit Ashes, lost quite spectacularly and has paid the penalty by dousing his trousers in lighter fluid and setting fire to them. Trousers burnt to Ashes the comic was left in just his little tight pants. Mark has been going for 28 hours as I write, and in the small hours Brendon popped back (with new trousers) to lend some more support. Finding an audience member snoozing on the front row with his mouth open, he decided it was time for tea, and, straddling the unconscious boy's face, unleashed his particulars and dipped them into his gaping mouth! Enough Burns! Omid Dajlili has been helping members of the Young Pleasance get pissed. Ok before the defamation writs come flooding in, let me clarify. The great man was about to go on stage when he found himself caught short. He had no choice but to pee in a bottle, and once relieved he promptly forgot about it. Sharing his dressing room are the kids from Bus! The Musical (with Alex Moyet and Phoebe Eclaire who have famous mums, can you spot who?) one of the boys thought he'd guzzle an abandoned bottle of apple juice. Never again will that poor kid have a wee dram. Excuse me, I just had to leave my post on Mark's stage in order to storm Brendon Burns' show to commemorate the French revolution. I have already been interrupted to re-enact the Civil War outside and to have the Boston Tea party. And now I have just run onto Brendon's stage with 13 others dousing him in water and jeering. I thought it might be quite French and Revolutionary to strip him too. However I broke my nail on his belt. Some would say too enthusiastic? Those poor girlies from sell-out show Babooshka keep getting their panties pinched. Sponsored by Coco de Mer they were given ample supplies of undies to feature on stage but they have a panty raider in their midst. True, one of the cast has a topless scene every day - and it could be any one of them, a veritable breast lottery - but there are now more breasts than bras in the cast and now a pant-swapping regime has been enforced by writer and performer Kiki Kendrick - as there simply aren't enough undercrackers to go round. So if anyone finds this impish pant thief, tell them to stop the pinching, or we may all end up seeing more boosh than was intended in Babooshka. Ooh! Mark's show has finished in style with the ten minute standing ovation he so richly deserves. With appearances from amongst Timothy West, Daniel Kitson, Andrew Maxwell and almost Steven Berkoff - well we all went and sang at him in the bar because he wouldn't come on stage - Watson has broken records and left not a dry eye in the house having performed for 33 hours and 41 minutes. So, as if the Bunny's not tired, I've hopped over to Spank! You Love It just in time to see Phil Nicholl dressed as Billy Holiday singing a Queen medley blacked up in boot polish with boobs to rival Dolly. He took the Spank!ers by storm, only to close with gorgeous Steven K Amos removing him from the stage by snogging the pants off him. Nicholl's show 'Almost Gay' is inspired by a fight he once had with Scott Capurro where Scott accused Phil of being homophobic. Unlikely from what I've seen, Nicholl tells me "Steven's snog was a nine out of ten but only because we were in public." Which only leaves me to find out what rating I'd give Phil in private. As ever I have been your Fringe Bunny XX AKA Isabel Robinson Topping and Butch Interview Put simply, Topping and Butch are the UK's finest cabaret double act. ScotsGay predicts that the next twelve months will see them go absolutely huge. Martin Walker interrupts the hardworking and prolific Andrew 'Butch' Simmons Quote "Both ScotsGay and The Scotsman gave us 5 stars last year - there's a lot to live up to." So what have you been doing in the last 12 months since your total sell out 2004 Edinburgh shows? Sittin' on our arses! NO! Last year's Fringe was very successful and helped us in a number of ways. We'd never played any other Festivals before but this year we've already done Manchester, Leicester, Prague and in September we'll do Dublin. It's also helped secure the Radio 4 slots on Loose Ends and got us work on Channel 5 and the Paramount Comedy Channel. We're writing a lot more and often now the songs will be our own music as well as the lyrics. We have managed to work that in to the schedule and still be able to play loads of venues on the gay scene round the country. It also helped that both ScotsGay and the Scotsman gave us 5 stars for the show so there's been a lot to live up to. What should the audience expect from the show? What is the show about? The main show "A Lot to Take In" is a brand new hour of material from the last two shows, but will be in similar style. Half the show is comedy songs and half stand-up and banter. We like to get as much topical stuff into the show as possible so we'll be writing material right up to the time the curtain goes up at 9.20pm. So far this year, we've announced to unsuspecting audiences, the score of an England International and the news of the Pope's death that happened minutes before we went on - all in (tasteful) song form. Aside from that we have set performance numbers which this year will include a poke at the Royal Family, the joy of being thin, and a parody of yob culture in "Chav! - The Musical". You have two shows, "A Lot to Take In" and "Filth!" What's the difference? Maggie Bourgein who played the posh tea lady with a mucky mouth who held everything together in "Afternoon Tease" last year was brilliant so we're incorporating her into the main show. The "other" show is one we don't really talk about. It's at the Underbelly for 4 nights only and it's really for those who know us and want to see how far we push the envelope (so to speak). By the way, it's strictly not for children or critics - so if ScotsGay want to come - they'll have to buy a ticket - and no reviews!! Is it true that Dara O'Brien dispensed some prophetic advice to Butch whilst in a toilet? What did he say? When we first played Edinburgh in 2003 we had just started the run - I think we were still in previews - and I went for a waz in the Pleasance Dome. Dara walked into the urinals and stood beside me - glanced across - and said "How did the show go tonight?" and I said "Fine thank you, I've just finished" and pulled my zipper up. The giggle turned into a laugh and I'd like to think we had a moment. Ha ha ha. At the end of the run I asked Dara where he thought we should play next year and he named the theatre, the room and the time and - as if by magic - we got it. The same thing happened the next year, he's a bit of lucky charm, so we're performing where Dara tells us to in future... unless it's a cubicle. So how do you like Edinburgh? Been out on the gay scene? Fan of the city? This is the bit where we all say "Oh we LURVE Edinburgh" - isn't it, and you Scots take the piss cos we think we know it all but we only see it in the summer chaos. Topping and I visit a couple of times out of season and it does feel like a home from home (see, I just said what you want). Like any place it has its problems but we especially like the sense of humour people have here - it's wonderfully dry, the beauty of the architecture and the fact everything's so walkable. The gay scene's great but you have to ask where to go as a lot of the bigger nights are one-offs that visitors won't catch up with until week 2! Which other comedians do you like? On the fringe, Dara O'Brien, for his charm and wit, Jason Byrne for making an hour go by out of seemingly nothing, Paul Foot for linking subject matters that can have us in stitches, Pam Ann for her beautiful comic creation and Julia Morris for her observation which is downloaded in broadband (she talks so fast I reckon she thinks that breathing is a speech impediment). Is SPANK! The best night on the Fringe? This is our top tip. James and Leon the organizers of Spank! in London have recreated a night at the Underbelly, which is gay friendly in a way some of the late-night stand-up shows can never achieve. It's just basically a feel-good show but as well as male stand-ups, it includes some of the best character comedy you'll find on the Fringe as well as some more alternative acts that really make you feel like you've seen 10 shows in one. Topping and Butch - A Lot to Take In Pleasance Courtyard 21.20 from 3rd Aug Topping and Butch - Filth! Underbelly 00.45 on 17th, 18th, 24th and 25th Aug ----------------------------------------------------------------------- BOOK REVIEWS ============ by Dirk Kriete King Nicholas and the Copeman Empire By Nick Copeman Published by Ebury Press £10.99 British humour is alive and well and lives in a caravan park in Sheringham, Norfolk. Seldom have I had so much fun reading an autobiography, which essentially this book is. The author - an unemployed caravan dweller - decided to change his name by deed poll to HM King Nicholas and founded a new empire from his royal seat - a 4-berth trailer on the Beeston Regis Caravan Park. The whole thing started as a bit of a joke - he was dared by his best friend to sign on at Cromer Job Centre wearing a crown and on a horse - but by now I suspect it'll make him a little more money then he was getting on the dole. Apparently - or so his publisher claims - he sells peerages on the internet, although a thorough and comprehensive 5 minute session on Google would not confirm that fact and he blags as many corporate freebies as he can manage. He's become a bit of a legend in his own lunchtime and has appeared in the local press numerous times, but I somehow doubt whether the notoriously stiff upper lipped British royalty will be choking on their cucumber sandwiches this summer, when they learn that they have been joined by this unlikely new figurehead. If you fancy a bit of light relief this autumn then this is a book I can thoroughly recommend and do have a look at his website as well, you might end up renaming yourself Lord Toff of Toffsville, although your mates will probably just think you're sad, anyway. Wicked Erotic Tales of Legendary Lovers Edited by Mitzi Szereto Published by Cleis £ 9.99 Here's another book I thoroughly enjoyed, it's one of those you can just pick up and read one or two of the twenty one stories in a spare half an hour or so and leave feeling cheered up, sexed up, perplexed or any other of a whole gamut of emotions. The editor has brought together a playful and varied collection, not only gratifying curiosity about sex symbols like Marilyn Monroe, but exciting readers with the imaginary adventures of such unlikely figures as Toulouse Lautrec, Sigmund Freud...and God. The stories are funny, sexy, provocative, but never dull and I would definitely say that this book is a tenner well spent. Go on, treat yourself.... Deep Water - A Sailor's Passage By E.M. Kahn Published by Harrington Park Press £9.99 In the 70's, having spent several years hitch hiking back and forth in Europe and getting bored by the seemingly endless roads and the occasional gropes of horny, hairy truckers, I got invited to crew on a sailing yacht out on its way to the West Indies. I won't bore you with details, let's just say that because of youthful stupidity I never got as far as the West Indies but instead got stuck on the Rock of Gibraltar for a few months. While there though I learned an important fact of life, if you're determined you'll always be able to blag yourself into any situation you really want to be in and eventually I managed to blag myself another job on another yacht and consequently spent the most enjoyable year cruising the Mediterranean and the Atlantic Ocean. So when this book arrived I really looked forward to revisiting the places in my mind so long almost forgotten. It did that and much more though, much, much more. It moved me deeply with its true sense of the realities of a life under sail. The story has us navigating through Hell Gate in the East River and through dense fog in Cape Cod. But surprisingly, given my history, was the fact that this book illustrates the special bond between two men committed to one another as they sail together, live together and care for each other through the best and worst of times. The author allows us to share his two deep and profound passions - the love of wind filling sails and the love of one man for another. And even something I usually find a real turn off is handled with real sensitivity and the inane horror of AIDS becomes bearable in the words of this truly gifted writer. Third & Heaven By Ben Patrick Johnson Published by Alyson £9.99 I'm not sure about this book, to me it seemed very shallow and had more than its fair share of American TV culture about it. It's all about four friends that support each other during love, heartbreak and pain. Does it sound a bit like 'Friends' to you? It certainly did to me and I didn't warm to it one bit. Having said that, I recently made friends with a 20 something lad in America in a chat room who likes books, a bit of a novelty in itself, but he reckoned that this book was one of the best he had read in a while. Perhaps I should have asked what other books he had read, but somehow we had other things on our minds.... Deadline By Steven Cooper Published by Alyson £9.99 Now, just to show you that I'm not just on a downer about the writing capabilities of our friends on the other side of the pond, here's another book by an American writer I thoroughly enjoyed. In fact I got quite excited getting the new novel by Steven Cooper through the post, remembering the strange story of a dead drag queen providing answers in his first mystery, With You in Spirit, and an unruly penis directing the action in his second Saving Valencia. And I was not disappointed by this newest book by this talented and imaginative author. The unusual plot involves the investigative reporter Damon Fitzgerald who hot on the heels of the story of his career is strangled to death in his own apartment. But that proves to be of little hindrance to this plucky reporter and he sets out to solve his own murder from the confines of his own grave. Steven Cooper once again has shown in this book that he is the master of thrills, slapstick and the supernatural in equal measures to delight his readers. Cruise Control - Under-standing Sex Addiction in Gay Men By Robert Weiss Published by Alyson £10.99 Are you addicted to sex? Have you ever really thought about it or asked yourself that question? I certainly hadn't and didn't I was really quite surprised to find that some people see sex as something you can be addicted to. Isn't it just the normal sex drive that has us out in the bars every weekend, I hear you cry. Well, I quite agree, but there are those that would like us to believe that Gay men live in a world of deeply conflicting messages when it comes to sex. There are constant messages that say they should be liberated, responsible, experimental, safe, cutting-edge, traditional, dominant, submissive, sex-positive and celibate - and above all else they are not supposed to follow a heterosexual model. Cruise Control is supposed to lead men to a better understanding of the difference between sexual compulsion and non-addictive sexual behaviour within the gay experience, but to be perfectly honest, I cannot see any reason in this book other then lining the coffers of a few psychotherapists by giving people yet another thing to worry about. Freshmen - The Best Erotic Fiction By Jesse Grant Published by Alyson £10.99 Now here's one for all of you who just like a good one handed read, well done for still being with us and you won't be disappointed by this book in the slightest. I tell you, it's been worth waiting for and reading through all those other reviews of boring books. This one has got it all, hot straight guys shooting in the back of another guys throat shouting "ohhh Cindy Lou", very special home videos featuring innocent farm boys, the pizza boy that really does deliver a hot load and the day at the beach when your brother in law tells you that he thinks of you when he's buried deep inside your sister. Just like the magazine by the same name this book features just the hottest and horniest stories of young gay men exploring their sexuality. This is one handed reading at its best. Live and Raw: Let the Most Powerful Name in Porn Work for You! By Chi Chi LaRue Published by Bruno Gmünder £12.99 Last but not least, here's a book for all your lovers of hunky tattooed men, a Bruno Gmünder book full of pictures of Chi Chi LaRue's favourite hunks. Of course being a book by this famous German publishing house the pictures are of stunning quality as are the men. Mouth watering bodies galore and for a bit of a preview you can visit Chi Chi's website at http://www.LiveAndRaw.com/ ----------------------------------------------------------------------- FAIR WAVED THE GOLDEN PORN ========================== by Justin Milne Regular contributors to Scots-Gay will be well aware of our Editor's nasty habits - like turning up with a box of DVDs the day before the copy date and telling you to get on with it. So it was that I settled down this afternoon with a box of Kleenex left over from last week's flu and tried to keep the cat off my knee as I viewed... First out of the box was "Fuck Fever" from Liquid London (http:// www.liquidlondon.com). A fair variety of mature guys (smooth, slightly hairy and some Hispanic) having hardcore fun, as they say. Afraid the vaguely arty narrative style didn't do it for me. But, there you go. Next were four much of a muchness vids: Bare Balls, Bare Hotel, Raw Rescue and Bareback Twink Street. Made in Eastern Europe, this q